So, I have had this struggle my whole life. I eat. I love food and consume it in the worst possible ways. I have sneaked it, hid it, and lied about it. It really has been my bane. I believe the battle began when I was about 7 or 8 years old and has been raging on ever since. At 10, I went to Weight Watchers for the first time, I followed that up with Deal-a-meal, the OA diet, Fit for Life, Susan Summers Diet, Weight Watchers again, Vegetarianism, Fasting, Fasting with prayer, the Daniel Fast...and the list goes on. I have given it to God time and time again and ran and snatched it from his hands just as many times...sometimes even before I completely handed it over. It is the thing I love to hate and the biggest of Satan's lies that I regularly give ear to.
Isaiah 44:20 in the NLV says, "The poor, deluded fool feeds on ashes. He is trusting something that can give him no help at all. Yet he cannot bring himself to ask, "Is this thing, this idol that I'm holding in my hand, a lie?"
From the first time I read that verse, I loved it. It was last year during my Beth Moore "Breaking Free" bible study. She was talking about all the things that we make important in our lives that have absolutely no value or devalue us. Like buying a fancy car that you can't afford and then not being able to put food on your table. You look good to passer's by, but you are really starving and broke. For me, it's the food. I believe that it will satisfy me, make me feel good, and have fun. Then I get fat, can't do the things I want, and feel horrible. In John 8:31-32 Jesus said to the people who believed in him, "You are truly my disciples if you keep obeying my teachings. And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."
I can vouch for this in many areas of my life, but still struggle with this one. The problem is that I KNOW the truth but am still holding onto my cupcake like Gollum with his ring. I don't want to let it weigh me down and end up dragging me into that pit, but every time Satan tells me how delicious something is going to be I bite...all the while choosing to block out what I know to be true. So I'm praying for an all out intervention...deliverance if you will. I'm tired of the fight, but also tired of giving in. I want this to be something that God has power over in my life and to stop telling him, "no, no, no...that's mine!" Because REALLY...no, no, no it's His and so am I. I can't stand with one hand willing to give Him everything and the other hand hanging onto the refrigerator door. Because "If a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand." Mark 3:25 NIV
Here is the rest of the verses surrounding the earlier verse from Isaiah to read it in context if you want. I love this because it is so..."oh my goodness, well obviously, duh!"
Isaiah 44:14 "He cut down cedars, or perhaps took a cypress or oak. He let it grow among the trees of the forest, or planted a pine, and the rain made it grow. 15 It is man's fuel for burning; some of it he takes and warms himself, he kindles a fire and bakes bread. But he also fashions a god and worships it; he makes an idol and bows down to it. 16 Half of the wood he burns in the fire; over it he prepares his meal, he roasts his meat and eats his fill. He also warms himself and says, "Ah! I am warm; I see the fire." 17 From the rest he makes a god, his idol; he bows down to it and worships. He prays to it and says, "Save me; you are my god." 18 They know nothing, they understand nothing; their eyes are plastered over so they cannot see, and their minds closed so they cannot understand. 19 No one stops to think, no one has the knowledge or understanding to say, "Half of it I used for fuel; I even baked bread over its coals, I roasted meat and I ate. Shall I make a detestable thing from what is left? Shall I bow down to a block of wood?" 20 He feeds on ashes, a deluded heart misleads him; he cannot save himself, or say, "Is not this thing in my right hand a lie?" 21 "Remember these things, O Jacob, for you are my servant, O Israel. I have made you, you are my servant; O Israel, I will not forget you."
http://www.biblestudytools.com/isaiah/44.html
Thursday, December 01, 2011
Monday, May 16, 2011
This is a story about my best friend...
I have told many people that I would write and tell about the details of these past few months. It has been a crazy ride for our family and one that I won't soon forget. So here it is...
So, I have a friend who has never steered me wrong. He is always honest and loving. He has never let me down and is just amazing. It was last year sometime when my friend told me that we needed to be ready to leave Nebraska at a moments notice. He said that we needed to downsize, prepare, and then wait. So we started working...selling furniture, giving stuff to the Goodwill, and organizing. We got a sleep number bed that comes completely apart and folds up, we got stackable shelves with plastic bins for drawers, sold our couch and bedroom furniture, etc. We didn't know what for, but knew that this friend would never lead us astray.
In early December, Robert and I took our annual certification and didn't end up passing, so they rescheduled us to retake it in three months.
A couple who used to be our neighbors at Boys Town and whom we have remained very good friends with had started working at a Christian organization with teen moms and expecting teens. At Christmas time, Robert and I traveled through Tulsa, OK where my friends are working/living. We immediately loved it there. It just felt like home. As we continued on to my brother's house, we talked about the possibility of someday working there. While in Ft. Worth, we talked about maybe applying. Our friends who worked at the Owasso location texted us and told us about an opening in Oklahoma City and so we decided to check it out on our way back. So when we left Texas, we called ahead to see if we could take the time to stop by and meet with the director of the place that had an opening.
It was kind of funny because on the way I was talking to Robert about wanting to stop at Chick Filet because they don't have any in Omaha. So we drove on for a while and didn't see one. So, he jokingly said, "well, if there is one by the time we exit we'll know this whole thing is a God thing." We laughed it off and continued on. There was nothing for the rest of the way, but when we got to the actual exit we needed to take, there was a lone Chick Filet sign signaling three miles to the left. We both cracked up laughing! It was really funny. Even funnier was that when we got to it, there were several restaurants around it, but nothing else was on the sign.
Anyway, we interviewed there and walked around. We both didn't feel super good about the interview, but were still really interested in the Owasso campus. When we got back to our friends house, she set up an interview with her boss and we met with her and talked for a while. It was amazing. She prayed during the interview and was very nice. We both loved that if we worked there, we could pray with the kids, lead them to Christ, and go to church with the girls off campus at a local church. She told us that she enjoyed talking with us, but that there were no openings at the time. So, we just left it at that.
Back home, my friend again told me that we would be done by May and to keep preparing. He didn't tell me what was coming or how it all was going to be going down, only to be ready.
In February, the friend who worked in Oklahoma called and invited us to come to Winter Jam in Tulsa on the 19th. We had that weekend off already, so just needed to take an extra day in order to make it. While there, my friend told me, "you are going to be here in May" and I just blurted it out to Robert and my Oklahoma friends. Robert just looked at me funny and my OK friend said, "you said it, we'll see you in May then."
When I got home, we had a month to prepare for our certification retake. We had been really trying to get everything ready and be good stewards of the job that we were doing. We changed a lot of things around, started doing a morning bible study, and worked on trying to fix some things up around the house. We really tried to do the best that we could. Before the review our boss heard about our bible study and told us that we couldn't do it because it could be seen as proselytizing and we weren't allowed to do that. We had a very difficult time with that as some of our boys were really enjoying it and learning a lot. It was frustrating to feel like we couldn't help them when they wanted help. In early March, they came in to do the review and we thought everything went well.
On the other side, I kept watching for an opening at the place in Tulsa, but there weren't any. So after a while I just disregarded what my friend told me. I started thinking that maybe it was just Oklahoma that we were supposed to go to. Then one day Robert said in passing that it might be kind of cool to go back to school full time. When he said it, it felt like a dream come true as I have always wanted to live on a college campus and go to school full time. It was so exciting thinking about doing that, so I started looking up all of the school options that were available. Both Robert and I felt like we were supposed to be in Oklahoma so I narrowed it down to schools there. We found Oklahoma Baptist University to have the programs we were interested in and decided to apply just to see what happened. Within days everything seemed to be coming together and it really looked like that was what we were going to end up doing.
During Spring Break, we decided to clean out our storage shed just to be proactive and get some stuff ready for a garage sale. The next day, our boss came to the house and told us that we did not pass our certification retake, but that he would talk to us more about it later. I had a funny feeling about how he said it and wondered if we would be let go.
Because I felt that way, we ended up talking to the boys to let them know that we did not pass our cert and that we may or may not be let go because of it. We told all of them that we loved them, would always be available and how to get a hold of us after they were done with BT. On Sunday evening I talked to my boss again to tell him something that was going on inside the house and he seemed very apprehensive to talk to me. I ended up staying up late with the boys that night to shoot the breeze and reminisce. Monday morning we gave them all a hug and said we'd miss them if we were not there. Our meeting was scheduled for 1:30 that day and the mail came at 1:00. In it was my acceptance letter from OBU! I was very excited and felt like it was a sign as to where we needed to head if we were let go. We went into the meeting and our boss, his boss, and the HR lady were all there. We were let go. During the meeting, they said that we were always good family teachers and they would not put us down as not rehire-able. We would be allowed to go and say goodbye to the boys one last time in a week or so and we would get a good severance package. We had two days to get all of our stuff out of the apartment while the boys were out of school. That ended up being very hectic, but with the help of several great friends at BT we were able to get it all done. It was amazing to watch how everything my friend had told me was happening. It made me really trust him and feel blessed to have a friend like him!
So to make a long story short...We moved all of our stuff to Oklahoma to prepare to go to school, then went on vacation to see family and friends in Texas, New Mexico, and Arizona. While in Arizona, we got a call from our friends who work at the children's home in Oklahoma saying there was an opening and that we should contact her boss to let her know we were still interested. I immediately said, "no, we already know what God wants us to do" without thinking. Then I told Robert what happened and he said to me, "well, we really should pray about it." As soon as the words came out of his mouth I knew that we were not going to be going to school in Shawnee after all and that what my friend had told me back in December was actually what was going to happen. So, we prayed about it, had our interview, and were asked to start work on May 1st.
So, we made the long drive back and have been working here with teenagers who are mothers or expecting since then. The funny thing is that everything that we were frustrated about with working at BT is different at this place. There aren't the same politics. We are actually free to talk to the kids and be who we really are. Since I have been here, I have seen two girls in my house come to Christ. We have time off to get refreshed and ready to come back to work. We get to go to church and worship God. Our kids are also free to do this. They can go to church camp, youth group, and do mission work. We love it! It was a long windy journey here, but through it all I have found that my friend is honest and faithful to what he tells me. I have a friend who will never leave me or forsake me. My prayer is that I always trust in him and spread the message to those who don't know him.
John 15:12 My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command. 15 I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. 16 You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit--fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. 17 This is my command: Love each other.
So, I have a friend who has never steered me wrong. He is always honest and loving. He has never let me down and is just amazing. It was last year sometime when my friend told me that we needed to be ready to leave Nebraska at a moments notice. He said that we needed to downsize, prepare, and then wait. So we started working...selling furniture, giving stuff to the Goodwill, and organizing. We got a sleep number bed that comes completely apart and folds up, we got stackable shelves with plastic bins for drawers, sold our couch and bedroom furniture, etc. We didn't know what for, but knew that this friend would never lead us astray.
In early December, Robert and I took our annual certification and didn't end up passing, so they rescheduled us to retake it in three months.
A couple who used to be our neighbors at Boys Town and whom we have remained very good friends with had started working at a Christian organization with teen moms and expecting teens. At Christmas time, Robert and I traveled through Tulsa, OK where my friends are working/living. We immediately loved it there. It just felt like home. As we continued on to my brother's house, we talked about the possibility of someday working there. While in Ft. Worth, we talked about maybe applying. Our friends who worked at the Owasso location texted us and told us about an opening in Oklahoma City and so we decided to check it out on our way back. So when we left Texas, we called ahead to see if we could take the time to stop by and meet with the director of the place that had an opening.
It was kind of funny because on the way I was talking to Robert about wanting to stop at Chick Filet because they don't have any in Omaha. So we drove on for a while and didn't see one. So, he jokingly said, "well, if there is one by the time we exit we'll know this whole thing is a God thing." We laughed it off and continued on. There was nothing for the rest of the way, but when we got to the actual exit we needed to take, there was a lone Chick Filet sign signaling three miles to the left. We both cracked up laughing! It was really funny. Even funnier was that when we got to it, there were several restaurants around it, but nothing else was on the sign.
Anyway, we interviewed there and walked around. We both didn't feel super good about the interview, but were still really interested in the Owasso campus. When we got back to our friends house, she set up an interview with her boss and we met with her and talked for a while. It was amazing. She prayed during the interview and was very nice. We both loved that if we worked there, we could pray with the kids, lead them to Christ, and go to church with the girls off campus at a local church. She told us that she enjoyed talking with us, but that there were no openings at the time. So, we just left it at that.
Back home, my friend again told me that we would be done by May and to keep preparing. He didn't tell me what was coming or how it all was going to be going down, only to be ready.
In February, the friend who worked in Oklahoma called and invited us to come to Winter Jam in Tulsa on the 19th. We had that weekend off already, so just needed to take an extra day in order to make it. While there, my friend told me, "you are going to be here in May" and I just blurted it out to Robert and my Oklahoma friends. Robert just looked at me funny and my OK friend said, "you said it, we'll see you in May then."
When I got home, we had a month to prepare for our certification retake. We had been really trying to get everything ready and be good stewards of the job that we were doing. We changed a lot of things around, started doing a morning bible study, and worked on trying to fix some things up around the house. We really tried to do the best that we could. Before the review our boss heard about our bible study and told us that we couldn't do it because it could be seen as proselytizing and we weren't allowed to do that. We had a very difficult time with that as some of our boys were really enjoying it and learning a lot. It was frustrating to feel like we couldn't help them when they wanted help. In early March, they came in to do the review and we thought everything went well.
On the other side, I kept watching for an opening at the place in Tulsa, but there weren't any. So after a while I just disregarded what my friend told me. I started thinking that maybe it was just Oklahoma that we were supposed to go to. Then one day Robert said in passing that it might be kind of cool to go back to school full time. When he said it, it felt like a dream come true as I have always wanted to live on a college campus and go to school full time. It was so exciting thinking about doing that, so I started looking up all of the school options that were available. Both Robert and I felt like we were supposed to be in Oklahoma so I narrowed it down to schools there. We found Oklahoma Baptist University to have the programs we were interested in and decided to apply just to see what happened. Within days everything seemed to be coming together and it really looked like that was what we were going to end up doing.
During Spring Break, we decided to clean out our storage shed just to be proactive and get some stuff ready for a garage sale. The next day, our boss came to the house and told us that we did not pass our certification retake, but that he would talk to us more about it later. I had a funny feeling about how he said it and wondered if we would be let go.
Because I felt that way, we ended up talking to the boys to let them know that we did not pass our cert and that we may or may not be let go because of it. We told all of them that we loved them, would always be available and how to get a hold of us after they were done with BT. On Sunday evening I talked to my boss again to tell him something that was going on inside the house and he seemed very apprehensive to talk to me. I ended up staying up late with the boys that night to shoot the breeze and reminisce. Monday morning we gave them all a hug and said we'd miss them if we were not there. Our meeting was scheduled for 1:30 that day and the mail came at 1:00. In it was my acceptance letter from OBU! I was very excited and felt like it was a sign as to where we needed to head if we were let go. We went into the meeting and our boss, his boss, and the HR lady were all there. We were let go. During the meeting, they said that we were always good family teachers and they would not put us down as not rehire-able. We would be allowed to go and say goodbye to the boys one last time in a week or so and we would get a good severance package. We had two days to get all of our stuff out of the apartment while the boys were out of school. That ended up being very hectic, but with the help of several great friends at BT we were able to get it all done. It was amazing to watch how everything my friend had told me was happening. It made me really trust him and feel blessed to have a friend like him!
So to make a long story short...We moved all of our stuff to Oklahoma to prepare to go to school, then went on vacation to see family and friends in Texas, New Mexico, and Arizona. While in Arizona, we got a call from our friends who work at the children's home in Oklahoma saying there was an opening and that we should contact her boss to let her know we were still interested. I immediately said, "no, we already know what God wants us to do" without thinking. Then I told Robert what happened and he said to me, "well, we really should pray about it." As soon as the words came out of his mouth I knew that we were not going to be going to school in Shawnee after all and that what my friend had told me back in December was actually what was going to happen. So, we prayed about it, had our interview, and were asked to start work on May 1st.
So, we made the long drive back and have been working here with teenagers who are mothers or expecting since then. The funny thing is that everything that we were frustrated about with working at BT is different at this place. There aren't the same politics. We are actually free to talk to the kids and be who we really are. Since I have been here, I have seen two girls in my house come to Christ. We have time off to get refreshed and ready to come back to work. We get to go to church and worship God. Our kids are also free to do this. They can go to church camp, youth group, and do mission work. We love it! It was a long windy journey here, but through it all I have found that my friend is honest and faithful to what he tells me. I have a friend who will never leave me or forsake me. My prayer is that I always trust in him and spread the message to those who don't know him.
John 15:12 My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command. 15 I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. 16 You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit--fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. 17 This is my command: Love each other.
Friday, March 18, 2011
A letter to you...
I know that I don't do what you want me to do, God.
I fail at every turn
I fall every time you give me a mountain to climb.
I do not deserve any of what you have done for me.
I am selfish, mean-spirited, hateful, cruel, over-indulgent,
I lie, I cheat, I manipulate, I kick and scream.
I feel like Paul where I know what I should do and I keep not doing it.
I keep making promises that I don't hold to
I keep saying I believe, but then fail to trust.
I hate my humanness and my insecurity
I wish that I could be more for you.
I just want to stand before you and hear you say,
"well done my good and faithful servant."
But I don't see it.
I keep getting in the way of the good that you could do through me.
Oh God, through it all, you have always kept your promises to me.
I have failed over and over
but you have continued to uphold your word.
I pray that you don't let others stumble on account of me
I pray that where I fail, you succeed.
I don't know how to get people to see you
I don't know what to say to show them how much you love them
I try to tell them about all that their lives could be with you
but they don't know you like I do
they don't see you like I do.
I long to know that everyone I know and love is there with you in the end.
Please Lord, I know that I get it wrong all the time,
but please, let them know you
let them see all that you did and continue to do for them
Let them see how amazing life is with you in it.
Let them know your grace and love and faithfulness
Let them understand what it means to really be loved by a father
Let them understand what it means to be cherished.
I never knew that before you and I can't imagine life without you now
God, I am so grateful to you for all you have done for me
I love you for changing me
I love you for taking this woman who didn't want you and making me into a woman who can't imagine living a day without you.
I love you for dying for me and saving me from myself.
I love you for all that you have planned for me, for all you have done for us, for earth, for our future that is secured in you.
I pray with all my heart, God that you bring them all! Change everyone's hearts!
Abba! Oh, how I love you! Words cannot even describe it.
Thank you, Thank you, Thank you for all you have done for me, are doing, and will do.
I am so excited for the future that is coming and for everyone to see your glory!
Come, Lord Jesus, Come!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eOY0mjjmx8Y
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=994VRkTu4cc&playnext=1&list=PLDBAB6EF7B9BB32DA
I fail at every turn
I fall every time you give me a mountain to climb.
I do not deserve any of what you have done for me.
I am selfish, mean-spirited, hateful, cruel, over-indulgent,
I lie, I cheat, I manipulate, I kick and scream.
I feel like Paul where I know what I should do and I keep not doing it.
I keep making promises that I don't hold to
I keep saying I believe, but then fail to trust.
I hate my humanness and my insecurity
I wish that I could be more for you.
I just want to stand before you and hear you say,
"well done my good and faithful servant."
But I don't see it.
I keep getting in the way of the good that you could do through me.
Oh God, through it all, you have always kept your promises to me.
I have failed over and over
but you have continued to uphold your word.
I pray that you don't let others stumble on account of me
I pray that where I fail, you succeed.
I don't know how to get people to see you
I don't know what to say to show them how much you love them
I try to tell them about all that their lives could be with you
but they don't know you like I do
they don't see you like I do.
I long to know that everyone I know and love is there with you in the end.
Please Lord, I know that I get it wrong all the time,
but please, let them know you
let them see all that you did and continue to do for them
Let them see how amazing life is with you in it.
Let them know your grace and love and faithfulness
Let them understand what it means to really be loved by a father
Let them understand what it means to be cherished.
I never knew that before you and I can't imagine life without you now
God, I am so grateful to you for all you have done for me
I love you for changing me
I love you for taking this woman who didn't want you and making me into a woman who can't imagine living a day without you.
I love you for dying for me and saving me from myself.
I love you for all that you have planned for me, for all you have done for us, for earth, for our future that is secured in you.
I pray with all my heart, God that you bring them all! Change everyone's hearts!
Abba! Oh, how I love you! Words cannot even describe it.
Thank you, Thank you, Thank you for all you have done for me, are doing, and will do.
I am so excited for the future that is coming and for everyone to see your glory!
Come, Lord Jesus, Come!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eOY0mjjmx8Y
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=994VRkTu4cc&playnext=1&list=PLDBAB6EF7B9BB32DA
Thursday, March 17, 2011
So many naturally occurring events...
Our scientists are so knowledgeable! We are just in the midst of several completely naturally occurring events causing millions and millions of fish and birds just keel over randomly. I'm sure glad these scientists are so smart!
Ecclesiastes 8:17 "...No one can comprehend what goes on under the sun. Despite all his efforts to search it out, man cannot discover its meaning. Even if a wise man claims he knows, he cannot really comprehend it."
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-12683360
http://www.live5news.com/Global/story.asp?S=14251534
http://www.hometownannapolis.com/news/env/2011/03/02-14/Cold-stress-blamed-for-New-Years-fish-kill.html
http://www.hcnews.com/shownews.asp?category=20&id=7563
http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/chronicle/7444348.html
http://www.irishtimes.com/newspaper/ireland/2011/0310/1224291778906.html
http://www.edp24.co.uk/news/investigation_launched_after_dead_pike_found_in_oulton_broad_1_815209
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/starving-b-c-eagles-swarm-dumps-20110224-171532-730.html
http://news.gather.com/viewArticle.action?articleId=281474979098066
http://www.perthnow.com.au/news/western-australia/thousands-of-dead-fish-have-been-washing-up-on-wa-beaches/story-e6frg14u-1226018687597?from=public_rss
http://www.calcuttanews.net/story/754720/ht/Tripura-zoo-on-alert-after-death-of-birds-animals
http://www.northplattebulletin.com/index.asp?show=news&action=readStory&storyID=20335&pageID=29
So, how about lets look at what the bible says:
Hosea 4:1-14 - Hear the word of the LORD, O people of Israel! The LORD has filed a lawsuit against you, saying: "There is no faithfulness, no kindness, no knowledge of God in your land. 2 You curse and lie and kill and steal and commit adultery. There is violence everywhere, with one murder after another. 3 That is why your land is not producing. It is filled with sadness, and all living things are becoming sick and dying. Even the animals, birds, and fish have begun to disappear. 4 "Don't point your finger at someone else and try to pass the blame! Look, you priests, my complaint is with you! 5 As a sentence for your crimes, you will stumble in broad daylight, just as you might at night, and so will your false prophets. And I will destroy your mother, Israel. 6 My people are being destroyed because they don't know me. It is all your fault, you priests, for you yourselves refuse to know me. Now I refuse to recognize you as my priests. Since you have forgotten the laws of your God, I will forget to bless your children. 7 The more priests there are, the more they sin against me. They have exchanged the glory of God for the disgrace of idols. 8 "The priests get fed when the people sin and bring their sin offerings to them. So the priests are glad when the people sin! 9 'Like priests, like people' -- since the priests are wicked, the people are wicked, too. So now I will punish both priests and people for all their wicked deeds. 10 They will eat and still be hungry. Though they do a big business as prostitutes, they will have no children, for they have deserted the LORD to worship other gods. 11 "Alcohol and prostitution have robbed my people of their brains. 12 They are asking a piece of wood to tell them what to do! They think a stick can tell them the future! Longing after idols has made them foolish. They have played the prostitute, serving other gods and deserting their God. 13 They offer sacrifices to idols on the tops of mountains. They go up into the hills to burn incense in the pleasant shade of oaks, poplars, and other trees."That is why your daughters turn to prostitution, and your daughters-in-law commit adultery. 14 Why should I punish them? For you men are doing the same thing, sinning with whores and shrine prostitutes. O foolish people! You will be destroyed, for you refuse to understand.
Ecclesiastes 8:17 "...No one can comprehend what goes on under the sun. Despite all his efforts to search it out, man cannot discover its meaning. Even if a wise man claims he knows, he cannot really comprehend it."
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-12683360
http://www.live5news.com/Global/story.asp?S=14251534
http://www.hometownannapolis.com/news/env/2011/03/02-14/Cold-stress-blamed-for-New-Years-fish-kill.html
http://www.hcnews.com/shownews.asp?category=20&id=7563
http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/chronicle/7444348.html
http://www.irishtimes.com/newspaper/ireland/2011/0310/1224291778906.html
http://www.edp24.co.uk/news/investigation_launched_after_dead_pike_found_in_oulton_broad_1_815209
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/starving-b-c-eagles-swarm-dumps-20110224-171532-730.html
http://news.gather.com/viewArticle.action?articleId=281474979098066
http://www.perthnow.com.au/news/western-australia/thousands-of-dead-fish-have-been-washing-up-on-wa-beaches/story-e6frg14u-1226018687597?from=public_rss
http://www.calcuttanews.net/story/754720/ht/Tripura-zoo-on-alert-after-death-of-birds-animals
http://www.northplattebulletin.com/index.asp?show=news&action=readStory&storyID=20335&pageID=29
So, how about lets look at what the bible says:
Hosea 4:1-14 - Hear the word of the LORD, O people of Israel! The LORD has filed a lawsuit against you, saying: "There is no faithfulness, no kindness, no knowledge of God in your land. 2 You curse and lie and kill and steal and commit adultery. There is violence everywhere, with one murder after another. 3 That is why your land is not producing. It is filled with sadness, and all living things are becoming sick and dying. Even the animals, birds, and fish have begun to disappear. 4 "Don't point your finger at someone else and try to pass the blame! Look, you priests, my complaint is with you! 5 As a sentence for your crimes, you will stumble in broad daylight, just as you might at night, and so will your false prophets. And I will destroy your mother, Israel. 6 My people are being destroyed because they don't know me. It is all your fault, you priests, for you yourselves refuse to know me. Now I refuse to recognize you as my priests. Since you have forgotten the laws of your God, I will forget to bless your children. 7 The more priests there are, the more they sin against me. They have exchanged the glory of God for the disgrace of idols. 8 "The priests get fed when the people sin and bring their sin offerings to them. So the priests are glad when the people sin! 9 'Like priests, like people' -- since the priests are wicked, the people are wicked, too. So now I will punish both priests and people for all their wicked deeds. 10 They will eat and still be hungry. Though they do a big business as prostitutes, they will have no children, for they have deserted the LORD to worship other gods. 11 "Alcohol and prostitution have robbed my people of their brains. 12 They are asking a piece of wood to tell them what to do! They think a stick can tell them the future! Longing after idols has made them foolish. They have played the prostitute, serving other gods and deserting their God. 13 They offer sacrifices to idols on the tops of mountains. They go up into the hills to burn incense in the pleasant shade of oaks, poplars, and other trees."That is why your daughters turn to prostitution, and your daughters-in-law commit adultery. 14 Why should I punish them? For you men are doing the same thing, sinning with whores and shrine prostitutes. O foolish people! You will be destroyed, for you refuse to understand.
Monday, February 21, 2011
Our trip and the destroyer at the concert...
This last weekend, we had been planing on going to our friends who live in Henderson, NE for the weekend, but last minute we heard it wouldn't work out. Another friend invited us to a concert in Tulsa, OK and we had kind of thought it wouldn't work because it is an 8 hour drive. So, we decided to just ask to see if we could get an extra day and it all worked out. So, Saturday morning we took off toward Oklahoma. It was such a nice relaxing drive just looking at all the beauty around us in the changing from winter to spring between here and there. Robert and I talked a lot about God's plans for our lives and how he has been showing each of us so much lately. Both of us have had some really cool things happening in our spiritual lives and it was really nice to have 8 hours of driving to share our hearts with each other...along with listening to comedy shows, music, and relaxing. I enjoy my husband more now than ever. He is so much fun! So we got to Owasso (just outside of Tulsa where our friends are) around 4:30 got Elijah fed, to the sitter, and left for the concert. When we arrived, it took us a while to finally find a place to sit that wasn't in the nosebleed section and where we didn't feel like we were going to go tumbling down the bleachers from them being so steep. We ended up right behind the stage, which was kind of cool since we could see all the pyrotechnics up close. There ended up being NewSong, Kutless, News Boys, Francesca Battistelli, David Crowder Band, Red, and KJ52. It was so awesome! It was amazing worship and a guy named Tony Nolan preached about his life growing up being abused after being bought for $200.00. He was so inspiring and profound to listen to. After feeling God's presence throughout the whole evening, when the last band came on, I had this horribly overwhelming feeling come over me. It was like I knew that something was wrong with Elijah that he was being abused or hurt in some way. I started freaking out and worrying. I had never left him with someone I had not met before and I was overcome with worry. My head was tingling, my heart was racing, and I didn't know what to do because we were 30 minutes away and my friend had left the phone number at home. I turned to Robert and told him I was really scared that he was being hurt and that I didn't know what to do. So we started praying. My friend taps me on the shoulder and says, "are you ok?" I said, "I'm just really worried about Elijah and I don't know why." She said, "Because Satan is trying to steal your joy." So I sat down right there and lifted my hands up to God. I prayed for him to give me peace to know that Elijah was safe and that if he was not that he was capable of moving mountains and was perfectly capable of protecting my son. So I stood up and praised him again and had a complete peace come over me that my friend was right. Just like it is written in John 10:10, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." So that is what I did and I had an absolute blast. Later, when I was talking to my friend, she told me that God told her I was struggling and to tell me what she told me. So thank you God for showing me who was behind my anxiety and thank you to my friend for listening. That was the most fun I've had in a long time. I also had a great time at your church...it was awesome! Great message on salvation!
The weekend ended to quickly! We spent time with Robert's mom, and I got to get in a little shopping, overall a very relaxing and refreshing weekend that I needed. It was great to get out on the open road and reconnect with Robert, friends, family, and get a little nature in too with our drive.
You can check out youtube for Winter Jam 2011 to see how awesome this concert was. Probably the best I've been to.
Oh and BTW...Elijah was just fine when we picked him up...sound asleep. :)
The weekend ended to quickly! We spent time with Robert's mom, and I got to get in a little shopping, overall a very relaxing and refreshing weekend that I needed. It was great to get out on the open road and reconnect with Robert, friends, family, and get a little nature in too with our drive.
You can check out youtube for Winter Jam 2011 to see how awesome this concert was. Probably the best I've been to.
Oh and BTW...Elijah was just fine when we picked him up...sound asleep. :)
Friday, January 28, 2011
Of mice and men...
There is a poem that was written by a Scottish man named Robert Burns called, "To a Mouse, on Turning Her Up in Her Nest with the Plough" where the famous quote, "the best laid schemes of mice and men often go astray (Go often askew)" came from.
In 2005, the year my mom died, Robert and I bought a house. We didn't ask God if we should buy the house. We didn't consult him about our job decisions at the time, about starting our own business, or about much of anything that we were going through except help in making it through the stress of it all. We just thought it all sounded good and moved forward. The housing market was booming. It was the obvious choice for a newly married couple to do in that particular year in that particular city. Every investor would have said you were crazy not to take part in the feeding frenzy that was the Phoenix housing market. When we got to the table to sign, the broker sprung a whole new set of numbers on us that included a much higher interest rate, payment, and a 2-year prepayment penalty...aside from asking for dishonest documentation in order to close the deal. We were left with a choice to make. At that table on that particular day, that still small voice inside me was screaming, "DO NOT SIGN THIS DEAL!" My mind at the time couldn't rationalize not signing it though. We were up $50,000 if we signed. We would lose the house if we didn't. The mortgage broker had waited to the very last minute that we could possibly sign the documents before he told us we were approved, so we didn't have any more time to rework the documents in order to get a new loan for the house. The seller was about to pull the sale from us and resell it for more money if we didn't close on the house by the next day. I thought I had no choice. I rationalized it by thinking, we were going to be making so much money in the long run. I could say hindsight is 20/20, but I could also say I was warned. Five years later, after having to rent the house because we couldn't sell it for what it was worth, then having to short sell it and take a hit on our credit because it went from being worth $230,000 to $75,000 and we had no way to maintain it, sell it, or rent it from another state, I can say I was warned. The problem is that I had a desire to have something that overshadowed the warning that God gave me. I had watched that house be built from the ground up. I had picked out the flooring, the layout, the color of the paint, the landscaping. I loved that house. When it came right down to it, I chose the house over God's plan for me. I made that house my rock for a time and put it above my creator.
I can say that God ended up still using it for good and it was a blessing at the time. I grew close to my sister-in-law in the house and we were able to help her out in a time when she needed help. We were also able to help a young lady move from the east coast to Phoenix where she may have had difficulty otherwise and she ended up being a very good renter. I also have a lot of good memories there with great friends. Financially though, we had high hopes for that house. It was well thought out...fool proof. That was at the time in Robert and my life when we were really concerned with money. We hadn't made the decision yet to give God control over our finances. So we were really excited about getting our little nest egg started. We didn't ask God though...we just assumed that it would be a good choice because everyone said it would. Then when He warned me, I ignored it.
Proverbs 16:3 says, "Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed."
This is what God has been putting on my heart lately. He not only wants me to give him my finances, my marriage, and my faith; but he wants me to give him every part of me. My time, my food, my trust, my marriage, my money, my fears, my failures, my hurts, my insecurities, my judgments, my anger, my thoughts, my all, and my love. He wants my everything. He doesn't want all this from me so I can live a boring, smug, religious life sitting in my house, reading my bible, and watching TBN. He wants my everything so I can become a radical barbarian for Christ...a believer in his son who wants to run and shout it from the mountain tops...who wants to feed the children in Uganda, dig wells in Haiti, free children in India, help prostitutes in China, whatever he calls me to do. He wants me to say, "yes Lord, I want to be that for you because you already gave me everything I could ever need. You died on a mountain top 2000 years ago so I could be free, you gave me living water so I could live forever with you, and you opened my eyes so I could see how much you love me and all of your children here on earth. I want to go to the ends of the earth for you and live a dangerous life because I'm already accounted for, but there are billions out there who aren't. Billions who don't know your name, what you came to do, what your fight is about. They don't know that you came to stomp out oppression, to cast out fear, to lead an uprising against the evil that is trying to take over this world. They don't know that you already have a plan that was laid down when you created the world. They don't know that Christ died for them 2000 years ago. That you new the number of hairs on their head before they were born and you still do. That you know everything they have ever said, thought, done, etc and you still love them dearly and are waiting for them to come to you and say, "Abba, Father, I know that I am a sinner and I believe that you sent your son to die for me on that cross to save me from my sins. I want to know you, I want to have you come into my heart and be the lord of my life. Thank you so much for saving me! In Jesus precious name!" Oh how I long to hear that you prayed those words! I long to know that everyone prays those words.
John 6:35 Then Jesus declared, "I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty. 36 But as I told you, you have seen me and still you do not believe. 37 All that the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away. 38 For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me. 39 And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all that he has given me, but raise them up at the last day. 40 For my Father's will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day."
Fortunately, God's purposes always come to pass.
Proverbs 19:21 NIV
Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails.
In 2005, the year my mom died, Robert and I bought a house. We didn't ask God if we should buy the house. We didn't consult him about our job decisions at the time, about starting our own business, or about much of anything that we were going through except help in making it through the stress of it all. We just thought it all sounded good and moved forward. The housing market was booming. It was the obvious choice for a newly married couple to do in that particular year in that particular city. Every investor would have said you were crazy not to take part in the feeding frenzy that was the Phoenix housing market. When we got to the table to sign, the broker sprung a whole new set of numbers on us that included a much higher interest rate, payment, and a 2-year prepayment penalty...aside from asking for dishonest documentation in order to close the deal. We were left with a choice to make. At that table on that particular day, that still small voice inside me was screaming, "DO NOT SIGN THIS DEAL!" My mind at the time couldn't rationalize not signing it though. We were up $50,000 if we signed. We would lose the house if we didn't. The mortgage broker had waited to the very last minute that we could possibly sign the documents before he told us we were approved, so we didn't have any more time to rework the documents in order to get a new loan for the house. The seller was about to pull the sale from us and resell it for more money if we didn't close on the house by the next day. I thought I had no choice. I rationalized it by thinking, we were going to be making so much money in the long run. I could say hindsight is 20/20, but I could also say I was warned. Five years later, after having to rent the house because we couldn't sell it for what it was worth, then having to short sell it and take a hit on our credit because it went from being worth $230,000 to $75,000 and we had no way to maintain it, sell it, or rent it from another state, I can say I was warned. The problem is that I had a desire to have something that overshadowed the warning that God gave me. I had watched that house be built from the ground up. I had picked out the flooring, the layout, the color of the paint, the landscaping. I loved that house. When it came right down to it, I chose the house over God's plan for me. I made that house my rock for a time and put it above my creator.
I can say that God ended up still using it for good and it was a blessing at the time. I grew close to my sister-in-law in the house and we were able to help her out in a time when she needed help. We were also able to help a young lady move from the east coast to Phoenix where she may have had difficulty otherwise and she ended up being a very good renter. I also have a lot of good memories there with great friends. Financially though, we had high hopes for that house. It was well thought out...fool proof. That was at the time in Robert and my life when we were really concerned with money. We hadn't made the decision yet to give God control over our finances. So we were really excited about getting our little nest egg started. We didn't ask God though...we just assumed that it would be a good choice because everyone said it would. Then when He warned me, I ignored it.
Proverbs 16:3 says, "Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed."
This is what God has been putting on my heart lately. He not only wants me to give him my finances, my marriage, and my faith; but he wants me to give him every part of me. My time, my food, my trust, my marriage, my money, my fears, my failures, my hurts, my insecurities, my judgments, my anger, my thoughts, my all, and my love. He wants my everything. He doesn't want all this from me so I can live a boring, smug, religious life sitting in my house, reading my bible, and watching TBN. He wants my everything so I can become a radical barbarian for Christ...a believer in his son who wants to run and shout it from the mountain tops...who wants to feed the children in Uganda, dig wells in Haiti, free children in India, help prostitutes in China, whatever he calls me to do. He wants me to say, "yes Lord, I want to be that for you because you already gave me everything I could ever need. You died on a mountain top 2000 years ago so I could be free, you gave me living water so I could live forever with you, and you opened my eyes so I could see how much you love me and all of your children here on earth. I want to go to the ends of the earth for you and live a dangerous life because I'm already accounted for, but there are billions out there who aren't. Billions who don't know your name, what you came to do, what your fight is about. They don't know that you came to stomp out oppression, to cast out fear, to lead an uprising against the evil that is trying to take over this world. They don't know that you already have a plan that was laid down when you created the world. They don't know that Christ died for them 2000 years ago. That you new the number of hairs on their head before they were born and you still do. That you know everything they have ever said, thought, done, etc and you still love them dearly and are waiting for them to come to you and say, "Abba, Father, I know that I am a sinner and I believe that you sent your son to die for me on that cross to save me from my sins. I want to know you, I want to have you come into my heart and be the lord of my life. Thank you so much for saving me! In Jesus precious name!" Oh how I long to hear that you prayed those words! I long to know that everyone prays those words.
John 6:35 Then Jesus declared, "I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty. 36 But as I told you, you have seen me and still you do not believe. 37 All that the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away. 38 For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me. 39 And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all that he has given me, but raise them up at the last day. 40 For my Father's will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day."
Fortunately, God's purposes always come to pass.
Proverbs 19:21 NIV
Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails.
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