A letter to you...

I know that I don't do what you want me to do, God.
I fail at every turn
I fall every time you give me a mountain to climb.
I do not deserve any of what you have done for me.
I am selfish, mean-spirited, hateful, cruel, over-indulgent,
I lie, I cheat, I manipulate, I kick and scream.

I feel like Paul where I know what I should do and I keep not doing it.
I keep making promises that I don't hold to
I keep saying I believe, but then fail to trust.
I hate my humanness and my insecurity

I wish that I could be more for you.
I just want to stand before you and hear you say,
"well done my good and faithful servant."
But I don't see it.
I keep getting in the way of the good that you could do through me.

Oh God, through it all, you have always kept your promises to me.
I have failed over and over
but you have continued to uphold your word.

I pray that you don't let others stumble on account of me
I pray that where I fail, you succeed.

I don't know how to get people to see you
I don't know what to say to show them how much you love them
I try to tell them about all that their lives could be with you
but they don't know you like I do
they don't see you like I do.

I long to know that everyone I know and love is there with you in the end.
Please Lord, I know that I get it wrong all the time,
but please, let them know you
let them see all that you did and continue to do for them

Let them see how amazing life is with you in it.
Let them know your grace and love and faithfulness
Let them understand what it means to really be loved by a father
Let them understand what it means to be cherished.

I never knew that before you and I can't imagine life without you now
God, I am so grateful to you for all you have done for me
I love you for changing me
I love you for taking this woman who didn't want you and making me into a woman who can't imagine living a day without you.
I love you for dying for me and saving me from myself.
I love you for all that you have planned for me, for all you have done for us, for earth, for our future that is secured in you.

I pray with all my heart, God that you bring them all! Change everyone's hearts!

Abba! Oh, how I love you! Words cannot even describe it.

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you for all you have done for me, are doing, and will do.
I am so excited for the future that is coming and for everyone to see your glory!

Come, Lord Jesus, Come!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eOY0mjjmx8Y
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=994VRkTu4cc&playnext=1&list=PLDBAB6EF7B9BB32DA