A letter to you...

I know that I don't do what you want me to do, God.
I fail at every turn
I fall every time you give me a mountain to climb.
I do not deserve any of what you have done for me.
I am selfish, mean-spirited, hateful, cruel, over-indulgent,
I lie, I cheat, I manipulate, I kick and scream.

I feel like Paul where I know what I should do and I keep not doing it.
I keep making promises that I don't hold to
I keep saying I believe, but then fail to trust.
I hate my humanness and my insecurity

I wish that I could be more for you.
I just want to stand before you and hear you say,
"well done my good and faithful servant."
But I don't see it.
I keep getting in the way of the good that you could do through me.

Oh God, through it all, you have always kept your promises to me.
I have failed over and over
but you have continued to uphold your word.

I pray that you don't let others stumble on account of me
I pray that where I fail, you succeed.

I don't know how to get people to see you
I don't know what to say to show them how much you love them
I try to tell them about all that their lives could be with you
but they don't know you like I do
they don't see you like I do.

I long to know that everyone I know and love is there with you in the end.
Please Lord, I know that I get it wrong all the time,
but please, let them know you
let them see all that you did and continue to do for them

Let them see how amazing life is with you in it.
Let them know your grace and love and faithfulness
Let them understand what it means to really be loved by a father
Let them understand what it means to be cherished.

I never knew that before you and I can't imagine life without you now
God, I am so grateful to you for all you have done for me
I love you for changing me
I love you for taking this woman who didn't want you and making me into a woman who can't imagine living a day without you.
I love you for dying for me and saving me from myself.
I love you for all that you have planned for me, for all you have done for us, for earth, for our future that is secured in you.

I pray with all my heart, God that you bring them all! Change everyone's hearts!

Abba! Oh, how I love you! Words cannot even describe it.

Thank you, Thank you, Thank you for all you have done for me, are doing, and will do.
I am so excited for the future that is coming and for everyone to see your glory!

Come, Lord Jesus, Come!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eOY0mjjmx8Y
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=994VRkTu4cc&playnext=1&list=PLDBAB6EF7B9BB32DA

So many naturally occurring events...

Our scientists are so knowledgeable! We are just in the midst of several completely naturally occurring events causing millions and millions of fish and birds just keel over randomly. I'm sure glad these scientists are so smart!

Ecclesiastes 8:17 "...No one can comprehend what goes on under the sun. Despite all his efforts to search it out, man cannot discover its meaning. Even if a wise man claims he knows, he cannot really comprehend it."

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-12683360

http://www.live5news.com/Global/story.asp?S=14251534

http://www.hometownannapolis.com/news/env/2011/03/02-14/Cold-stress-blamed-for-New-Years-fish-kill.html

http://www.hcnews.com/shownews.asp?category=20&id=7563

http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/chronicle/7444348.html

http://www.irishtimes.com/newspaper/ireland/2011/0310/1224291778906.html

http://www.edp24.co.uk/news/investigation_launched_after_dead_pike_found_in_oulton_broad_1_815209

http://ca.news.yahoo.com/starving-b-c-eagles-swarm-dumps-20110224-171532-730.html

http://news.gather.com/viewArticle.action?articleId=281474979098066

http://www.perthnow.com.au/news/western-australia/thousands-of-dead-fish-have-been-washing-up-on-wa-beaches/story-e6frg14u-1226018687597?from=public_rss

http://www.calcuttanews.net/story/754720/ht/Tripura-zoo-on-alert-after-death-of-birds-animals

http://www.northplattebulletin.com/index.asp?show=news&action=readStory&storyID=20335&pageID=29

So, how about lets look at what the bible says:

Hosea 4:1-14 - Hear the word of the LORD, O people of Israel! The LORD has filed a lawsuit against you, saying: "There is no faithfulness, no kindness, no knowledge of God in your land. 2 You curse and lie and kill and steal and commit adultery. There is violence everywhere, with one murder after another. 3 That is why your land is not producing. It is filled with sadness, and all living things are becoming sick and dying. Even the animals, birds, and fish have begun to disappear. 4 "Don't point your finger at someone else and try to pass the blame! Look, you priests, my complaint is with you! 5 As a sentence for your crimes, you will stumble in broad daylight, just as you might at night, and so will your false prophets. And I will destroy your mother, Israel. 6 My people are being destroyed because they don't know me. It is all your fault, you priests, for you yourselves refuse to know me. Now I refuse to recognize you as my priests. Since you have forgotten the laws of your God, I will forget to bless your children. 7 The more priests there are, the more they sin against me. They have exchanged the glory of God for the disgrace of idols. 8 "The priests get fed when the people sin and bring their sin offerings to them. So the priests are glad when the people sin! 9 'Like priests, like people' -- since the priests are wicked, the people are wicked, too. So now I will punish both priests and people for all their wicked deeds. 10 They will eat and still be hungry. Though they do a big business as prostitutes, they will have no children, for they have deserted the LORD to worship other gods. 11 "Alcohol and prostitution have robbed my people of their brains. 12 They are asking a piece of wood to tell them what to do! They think a stick can tell them the future! Longing after idols has made them foolish. They have played the prostitute, serving other gods and deserting their God. 13 They offer sacrifices to idols on the tops of mountains. They go up into the hills to burn incense in the pleasant shade of oaks, poplars, and other trees."That is why your daughters turn to prostitution, and your daughters-in-law commit adultery. 14 Why should I punish them? For you men are doing the same thing, sinning with whores and shrine prostitutes. O foolish people! You will be destroyed, for you refuse to understand.

Our trip and the destroyer at the concert...

This last weekend, we had been planing on going to our friends who live in Henderson, NE for the weekend, but last minute we heard it wouldn't work out. Another friend invited us to a concert in Tulsa, OK and we had kind of thought it wouldn't work because it is an 8 hour drive. So, we decided to just ask to see if we could get an extra day and it all worked out. So, Saturday morning we took off toward Oklahoma. It was such a nice relaxing drive just looking at all the beauty around us in the changing from winter to spring between here and there. Robert and I talked a lot about God's plans for our lives and how he has been showing each of us so much lately. Both of us have had some really cool things happening in our spiritual lives and it was really nice to have 8 hours of driving to share our hearts with each other...along with listening to comedy shows, music, and relaxing. I enjoy my husband more now than ever. He is so much fun! So we got to Owasso (just outside of Tulsa where our friends are) around 4:30 got Elijah fed, to the sitter, and left for the concert. When we arrived, it took us a while to finally find a place to sit that wasn't in the nosebleed section and where we didn't feel like we were going to go tumbling down the bleachers from them being so steep. We ended up right behind the stage, which was kind of cool since we could see all the pyrotechnics up close. There ended up being NewSong, Kutless, News Boys, Francesca Battistelli, David Crowder Band, Red, and KJ52. It was so awesome! It was amazing worship and a guy named Tony Nolan preached about his life growing up being abused after being bought for $200.00. He was so inspiring and profound to listen to. After feeling God's presence throughout the whole evening, when the last band came on, I had this horribly overwhelming feeling come over me. It was like I knew that something was wrong with Elijah that he was being abused or hurt in some way. I started freaking out and worrying. I had never left him with someone I had not met before and I was overcome with worry. My head was tingling, my heart was racing, and I didn't know what to do because we were 30 minutes away and my friend had left the phone number at home. I turned to Robert and told him I was really scared that he was being hurt and that I didn't know what to do. So we started praying. My friend taps me on the shoulder and says, "are you ok?" I said, "I'm just really worried about Elijah and I don't know why." She said, "Because Satan is trying to steal your joy." So I sat down right there and lifted my hands up to God. I prayed for him to give me peace to know that Elijah was safe and that if he was not that he was capable of moving mountains and was perfectly capable of protecting my son. So I stood up and praised him again and had a complete peace come over me that my friend was right. Just like it is written in John 10:10, "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." So that is what I did and I had an absolute blast. Later, when I was talking to my friend, she told me that God told her I was struggling and to tell me what she told me. So thank you God for showing me who was behind my anxiety and thank you to my friend for listening. That was the most fun I've had in a long time. I also had a great time at your church...it was awesome! Great message on salvation!

The weekend ended to quickly! We spent time with Robert's mom, and I got to get in a little shopping, overall a very relaxing and refreshing weekend that I needed. It was great to get out on the open road and reconnect with Robert, friends, family, and get a little nature in too with our drive.

You can check out youtube for Winter Jam 2011 to see how awesome this concert was. Probably the best I've been to.

Oh and BTW...Elijah was just fine when we picked him up...sound asleep. :)

Of mice and men...

There is a poem that was written by a Scottish man named Robert Burns called, "To a Mouse, on Turning Her Up in Her Nest with the Plough" where the famous quote, "the best laid schemes of mice and men often go astray (Go often askew)" came from.

In 2005, the year my mom died, Robert and I bought a house. We didn't ask God if we should buy the house. We didn't consult him about our job decisions at the time, about starting our own business, or about much of anything that we were going through except help in making it through the stress of it all. We just thought it all sounded good and moved forward. The housing market was booming. It was the obvious choice for a newly married couple to do in that particular year in that particular city. Every investor would have said you were crazy not to take part in the feeding frenzy that was the Phoenix housing market. When we got to the table to sign, the broker sprung a whole new set of numbers on us that included a much higher interest rate, payment, and a 2-year prepayment penalty...aside from asking for dishonest documentation in order to close the deal. We were left with a choice to make. At that table on that particular day, that still small voice inside me was screaming, "DO NOT SIGN THIS DEAL!" My mind at the time couldn't rationalize not signing it though. We were up $50,000 if we signed. We would lose the house if we didn't. The mortgage broker had waited to the very last minute that we could possibly sign the documents before he told us we were approved, so we didn't have any more time to rework the documents in order to get a new loan for the house. The seller was about to pull the sale from us and resell it for more money if we didn't close on the house by the next day. I thought I had no choice. I rationalized it by thinking, we were going to be making so much money in the long run. I could say hindsight is 20/20, but I could also say I was warned. Five years later, after having to rent the house because we couldn't sell it for what it was worth, then having to short sell it and take a hit on our credit because it went from being worth $230,000 to $75,000 and we had no way to maintain it, sell it, or rent it from another state, I can say I was warned. The problem is that I had a desire to have something that overshadowed the warning that God gave me. I had watched that house be built from the ground up. I had picked out the flooring, the layout, the color of the paint, the landscaping. I loved that house. When it came right down to it, I chose the house over God's plan for me. I made that house my rock for a time and put it above my creator.

I can say that God ended up still using it for good and it was a blessing at the time. I grew close to my sister-in-law in the house and we were able to help her out in a time when she needed help. We were also able to help a young lady move from the east coast to Phoenix where she may have had difficulty otherwise and she ended up being a very good renter. I also have a lot of good memories there with great friends. Financially though, we had high hopes for that house. It was well thought out...fool proof. That was at the time in Robert and my life when we were really concerned with money. We hadn't made the decision yet to give God control over our finances. So we were really excited about getting our little nest egg started. We didn't ask God though...we just assumed that it would be a good choice because everyone said it would. Then when He warned me, I ignored it.

Proverbs 16:3 says, "Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed."

This is what God has been putting on my heart lately. He not only wants me to give him my finances, my marriage, and my faith; but he wants me to give him every part of me. My time, my food, my trust, my marriage, my money, my fears, my failures, my hurts, my insecurities, my judgments, my anger, my thoughts, my all, and my love. He wants my everything. He doesn't want all this from me so I can live a boring, smug, religious life sitting in my house, reading my bible, and watching TBN. He wants my everything so I can become a radical barbarian for Christ...a believer in his son who wants to run and shout it from the mountain tops...who wants to feed the children in Uganda, dig wells in Haiti, free children in India, help prostitutes in China, whatever he calls me to do. He wants me to say, "yes Lord, I want to be that for you because you already gave me everything I could ever need. You died on a mountain top 2000 years ago so I could be free, you gave me living water so I could live forever with you, and you opened my eyes so I could see how much you love me and all of your children here on earth. I want to go to the ends of the earth for you and live a dangerous life because I'm already accounted for, but there are billions out there who aren't. Billions who don't know your name, what you came to do, what your fight is about. They don't know that you came to stomp out oppression, to cast out fear, to lead an uprising against the evil that is trying to take over this world. They don't know that you already have a plan that was laid down when you created the world. They don't know that Christ died for them 2000 years ago. That you new the number of hairs on their head before they were born and you still do. That you know everything they have ever said, thought, done, etc and you still love them dearly and are waiting for them to come to you and say, "Abba, Father, I know that I am a sinner and I believe that you sent your son to die for me on that cross to save me from my sins. I want to know you, I want to have you come into my heart and be the lord of my life. Thank you so much for saving me! In Jesus precious name!" Oh how I long to hear that you prayed those words! I long to know that everyone prays those words.

John 6:35 Then Jesus declared, "I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty. 36 But as I told you, you have seen me and still you do not believe. 37 All that the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away. 38 For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me. 39 And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all that he has given me, but raise them up at the last day. 40 For my Father's will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day."

Fortunately, God's purposes always come to pass.

Proverbs 19:21 NIV
Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails.

The Heart of Truth

By Cindy Fetty
December 11, 2010

It was a dark and stormy night. Eve Miller was driving down Palm St on her way home from the grocery store. She was really tired after the long day Christmas shopping for her two boys. Her cell phone chirped from her purse on the seat next to her and she looked over to see who was calling. Suddenly, she heard a loud screech and her world went dark. She woke up in the hospital with tubes coming out of her nose and wires attached to her arms. Her husband and two boys were sitting across from her waiting patiently to see if she would awake. As she looked around, her husband jumped up and ran to her side. “Honey, oh, I’m so glad you are awake. I was so scared! You were in an accident and have been unconscious for three days.” After several days in the hospital, Eve was released to finish healing at home. Now, she had the unfortunate task of waiting to find out what the repercussions of this accident were going to be for her. In looking at this scenario, there were probably a few key witnesses that could have told the police what they saw at the scene of the accident. The other driver would have had a perspective too. Even Eve would have had her version of what she remembered. In a court of law, the job of the jury would be to piece all of these stories together to figure out who was at fault. Best case, they would have had to take the subjective responses of eye-witnesses and mixed them with the data from the scene of the crime in order to come up with what they believed the truth to be. Finding the truth would have been even easier if there happened to be any forensic evidence. The jury would then have to weigh the likelihood of truth out by if they thought anyone was making up information to keep from getting in trouble, if the witnesses were doing something else and only saw a portion of what happened, or if there were any memory or perception issues going on. Each witness would certainly say that their story was the truth. There would, however, only be one truth. This is true of many different circumstances in life. People may try to manipulate the truth, but at its core it is generally verifiable and not subjective.

Throughout history, people from all different walks of life have tried to manipulate the truth. Truth claims have been manipulated to support all sorts of agenda’s. Murderers have made up alibis, companies have forged documentation, and religious leaders have invented whole faith doctrines on false evidence. Jeremiah 9:5 puts it this way, “Friend deceives friend, and no one speaks the truth. They have taught their tongues to lie; they weary themselves with sinning (NIV 1984).” You may ask, what it truth anyway? According to Michael D. Palmer, “A fact is a state-of-affairs, that is, an object, a condition, a circumstance, or an event. (…) State-of-affairs, and hence facts, exist even if no one ever reports or describes them, and they exist independently of our language and thought. (…) A statement is true when it describes a fact (a state-of-affairs that exists); or in the case of a statement about the past, when it describes a state-of-affairs that did occur; or in the case of the future, one that will occur (Palmer 1998).” While this is not always the most common understanding of truth in our society today, it is the only way that stands up to reason. There are many different belief systems that try to describe truth as something else. A prime example of this would be individualism. Individualism “is the belief that the individual is the primary reality and that our understanding of the universe and lifestyle should be centered in oneself (Wilkens and Sanford 2009).” While it is healthy to have a good self-esteem and value for oneself, it is not very realistic that the only truths in life are what we think they are. William Earnest Henley’s “Invictus” does a good job of showing what Individualism looks like in our society today. He wraps up his poem by stating:
“It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate;
I am the captain of my soul (Sire 1990).”
There are, however, two sides to individualism that should be explored. One side, “utilitarian individualism”, could be better coined as a company president’s viewpoint; where who you are is based on how much you have acquired and how much clout or status you have. The other side, “expressive individualism”, could be described as someone who wants to be free to be themselves without having to think of others (Sire 1990). People on both sides of individualism believe that they are the ultimate judge of what is right and wrong for them. So, the question would be, are there rights and wrongs that are state-of-affairs? Does right and wrong exist independently of our language and thought? C.S. Lewis spent a majority of his life searching for truth. In Mere Christianity, he said, “Now this Law or Rule about Right and Wrong used to be called the Law of Nature. Nowadays, when we talk of the ‘laws of nature’ we usually mean things like gravitation, or heredity, or the laws of chemistry. But when the older thinkers called the Law of Right and Wrong ‘the Law of Nature’, they really meant the Law of Human Nature (Lewis 1952).” He then goes on to point out that this law is the only law that is open to our choice to disobey. We cannot disobey the laws of gravity, heredity, or chemistry. We can, however, choose to treat people poorly, but when we do, we know at our core that we are wrong (Lewis 1952). As humans, we know that it is wrong to torture and kill others. We know that it is wrong to hurt children. We know that it is wrong to steal, lie, cheat, murder, lust after, etc. If we didn’t know that these things were wrong we wouldn’t have it engrained in us to hide them, to lie about them, to justify them or manipulate out of them. Manipulation is our human response to a truth we don’t want to look at. 2 Peter 2:2 points out that, “Many will follow their shameful ways and will bring the way of truth into disrepute (NIV 1984).” Psalm’s 15 is a great response to this:
“LORD, who may dwell in your sanctuary? Who may live on your holy hill? He whose walk is blameless and who does what is righteous, who speaks the truth from his heart and has no slander on his tongue, who does his neighbor no wrong and casts no slur on his fellowman, who despises a vile man but honors those who fear the LORD, who keeps his oath even when it hurts, who lends his money without usury and does not accept a bribe against the innocent. He who does these things will never be shaken (NIV 1984).”

In order to show this a little more clearly, we must look at truth to see how it is generally verifiable. Throughout history, many different religions, worldviews, and thought processes have come and gone. In most of these, there is a common thread of right and wrong. In looking at ancient writings from Babylon, Egypt, India, or Jerusalem there are several universal truths; do not murder, do not slander, do not treat people poorly, do not oppress. On the good side; we are to uphold human life, love each other, and treat others how we would like to be treated (C. S. Lewis 1944). In our own history, the founders of the United States of America put in The Declaration of Independence the following:
“We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”
If we do not see these things as self evident, our world breaks down. If everyone is free to do his or her own will at random, we run into one person’s will interfering with another’s. For example, if I don’t like you and want to kill you, you lose your choice when I act on my desire. So, there must be a law to keep me from making my choice your reality. When this system breaks down, we see corruption and loss of freedom. This brings us to another worldview that aims to break this system of right and wrong down. Scientific naturalism is a world view that came into the picture to redefine the “Laws of Nature.” As stated earlier, C.S. Lewis’ definition of the laws of nature referred to human nature. In scientific naturalism, the laws of nature refer directly to how everything is governed in the universe. The problem here is that this worldview proposed that there are no real laws, only random happenings that bring things about. So the term “law” is only used as a way to describe something that is not really a law in the first place. Either way, these laws of nature are not thought to be there for a reason, they are just there and must be used to define how everything works (Wilkens and Sanford 2009). Lewis responds to this idea by stating, “When you say that nature is governed by certain laws, this may only mean that nature does, in fact, behave in a certain way. The so-called laws may not be anything real- anything above and beyond the actual facts which we observe. But in the case of Man, we saw that this will not do. The Law of Human Nature, or of Right and Wrong, must be something above and beyond the actual facts, you have something else-a real law which we did not invent and which we know we ought to obey (C. Lewis 1952).” This truth is verifiable in our world and throughout history. Society breaks down when we do not follow the Laws of Human Nature. God calls us as Christians to, “Buy the truth and do not sell it; get wisdom, discipline and understanding (NIV 1984).”

Truth doesn’t depend on our own personal experiences. There is, however, a worldview that believes it does. “Postmodern Tribalism” strives to say that our truth is entirely dependent on our culture and experiences as individuals (Wilkens and Sanford 2009). While this is a good example of our personal perspective, it hardly encompasses actual truth. For example, a child growing up with serious physical or emotional abuse may come to believe that all children are abused, people are not to be trusted, or that they are not lovable. All of these things are understandable perspectives based on that child’s experiences, but they are not truth. That child may even then begin to treat other people bad or act out because he doesn’t trust, or he wants to get attention in ways he is used to. His perspective will then create a reality for him of people not liking him, treating him poorly, and pushing him away. This will then reinforce his original beliefs and catapult him into adulthood thinking that there are no laws of human nature that apply to him. As a Christian, it is important to understand postmodern tribalism because it helps us to know where our fellow man is coming from. We cannot turn our backs on the social injustices of the world, just because someone’s perspective of the world is not true. It is our job to show them the truth. As Christians, we are blessed because we know the truth. In John 8:31-36 Jesus said,
"If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." They answered him, "We are Abraham's descendants and have never been slaves of anyone. How can you say that we shall be set free?" Jesus replied, "I tell you the truth, everyone who sins is a slave to sin. Now a slave has no permanent place in the family, but a son belongs to it forever. So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed (NIV 1984).”
So, knowing truth is a way to be set free from the restraints that lies hold over us. Our personal experiences may make us understand truth more fully, but they don’t change truth. One of the great minds in history, Aristotle, pointed out that our world is full of order. That everything is moving towards a final purpose (Palmer 1998). We have a final goal and an ultimate truth that we are heading for. It doesn’t matter what we believe or what we hope for, the truth is still there. Because of this, it is important to understand and do what is right. In Matthew 7:12 it says, “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets (NIV 1984).” If this truth were to be utilized by the world as a whole, we would live in a completely different reality. If we all treated each other as we would like to be treated, we would solve every social injustice. We would no longer have issues like world hunger, poverty, murder, slander, or oppression. Aristotle believed that our virtue was “developed by habits which help a person to achieve happiness. Virtue aims at the intermediate: it is a mean between the vices of defect and excess. For example, the virtue courage lies in a mean between rashness (excess) and timidity (deficiency) (Palmer 1998).” Virtue is there waiting for us to act whether we do actually act or not. Many of us will choose to go the path of least resistance; the road that looks the most fun or exciting which most often leads to dissatisfaction. As a Christian, this is not the road that we are called to take. Matthew 7:13-14 says, “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it. (NIV 1984).” God has told us the truth about this world. He has laid it out in his word for us to find. It is true whether we choose to grab hold of it or not.

Now, let us go back to our initial story about Eve Miller and her family. What was the truth in her situation? Do you remember how she heard her phone and looked over to see who was calling right before the accident? It would be easy to assume that the accident was her fault because she looked down for a second. The truth is entirely different though. While she did look away, the car that hit her ran a red light. The driver had a malfunction in his breaks that was caused by the automobile manufacturer. The only thing that Eve was unable to do because of the phone call was react. She didn’t see the other car coming. We could have just said what we believed to be true as those who believe in individualism do, but we would have been wrong. We also could have taken the approach of scientific naturalism and assumed there was no outside cause for her accident. Again, we would have been mistaken. Or we could have even gone with our experience and assumed that Eve was in the wrong because of her social status of being able to afford nice gifts for her children. We could have taken offense to the fact that she was driving a nice vehicle and married to someone who obviously cared about her. All of these things could have led us to convict Eve right there on the spot. We would have been completely off the mark on all counts though. While it was possible to manipulate, the truth was verifiable and not subjective.

Coincidentally...

Before 6 years ago, I never really experienced a whole lot of coincidences in my life. I kind of went through life just making decisions on my own and never really noticed anything unusual. Six years ago, however, my life took a kind of weird twist. I wrote a letter to God to show me if he was real. I met this guy, Robert, shortly after that on an online dating website and we met for coffee. We hit it off and coincidentally he invited me to his church. He told me if I didn't like it, he would never ask me to go again. I was really not a "religious" person and had some serious dislike for hypocritical Christian people, but I agreed since I only had to go one time. This church had a sign outside that said, "No Perfect People Allowed", so I thought these Christians just might not be as snooty as some of the others I had met. When I went in, they were actually really nice and they were wearing jeans...which I never thought was allowed at church. The stuff that pastor was talking about was actually real world stuff that didn't make me feel like I was a horrible person. It made me feel loved by this God who wants a personal relationship with us and it made sense. It wasn't very long before I prayed this prayer for God's son, Jesus, to come into my heart and guide me because I am not perfect and need his direction in my life. I had been working with this lady who did energy healing at the time. Robert told me that he had a bad feeling about me going there and thought that it had Satanic roots.

Coincidentally, after I accepted Christ into my heart and asked him to guide me I felt really sick when I went to this ladies house. It felt like there were chains on my legs the closer I got to the room where she did her energy work. I also noticed that she was really sick when she claimed that you could heal yourself with energy work. She regularly did this energy work on herself, yet she was so sick that she often couldn't leave her house...there was really no reason for her sickness. At the time, I felt like I couldn't work there anymore because of how ill and heavy her house made me feel. This was all just a coincidence though, I'm sure.

Then Robert and I went to visit his mom in Oklahoma so I could meet her. While there, we told her of our plans to move in together before we were married. In a pretty harsh way, she told us it was not God's plan for us to live that way. I felt convicted of what she was saying and Robert and I decided to be abstinent until we were married. I'm sure it was all just a strange coincidence, but being abstinent seemed to really bring us closer together. Without sex in the picture, we were able to focus on really getting to know each other. Ir allowed us to appreciate each other for who we really were without sex getting in the way. I'm sure there is no real reason to be abstinent because according to the world sex is just sex and has no real value accept for procreating and having fun, but coincidentally it really made a huge impact on our relationship to go without it.

Then, coincidentally of course, I was looking for a job and asked God to show me where he wanted me to work. I was worried about not making enough money and not being able to pay our house payment. I had applied for a job with a company working with adults with disabilities, but it only paid half of what I needed to make. I was set on not taking it because of that. I was supposed to go to a function at my church, but coincidentally the friend I was supposed to go with got sick. I had been invited to a party at another friends house and decided to go to that instead. While there, I just happened to start talking with a woman who worked as a manager for a company that worked with adults with disabilities. After talking for an hour, we both realized that she just happened to be the manager of the company that I had been offered the job for earlier that I didn't think I should take. Coincidentally, I got promoted twice in three months and was making within $.25 of what I was making previously, which was enough to pay my bills.

Then, again coincidentally, Robert and I decided it was time for us to start giving our full tithe to God...meaning that we give God 10% of our money. The Sunday that we did that, we just happened upon the Boys Town job listing and were hired within two weeks at a job that completely covers the cost of all of our living expenses. I'm sure there is no correlation to these events though.

In the past six years, there have been a lot of these strange coincidences. I just happened to feel like I was told by God to look up certain scriptures that just happened to fit exactly what I needed to hear at the moment when I had never read that scripture before. I have had the same song come on the radio every time I got in the car when I was sad and then felt like God told me to look up a verse that said the same thing that the song said another time when I asked him to show me what to do.

Recently, I felt like God told me that I needed to let go of some anger that I had been holding onto for years. It seemed like he was telling me to go and apologize to someone I really didn't want to apologize to. I knew that I was supposed to obey him, so I did. The time came when I was in the right place and time to do this and coincidentally, everything worked out wonderfully. The apology went great and I knew at the time that God had prepared the way for this to happen. Robert and I had planned on submitting our paperwork for adoption right after this and coincidentally, we got pregnant with our son the next month after trying for five years. Obedience has nothing to do with it though. It just happened to coincide with my letting go of something I felt like I was asked to and giving it to God.

Some people have said that there is no God or if there is, he is not interested in our lives. I say that I have a God who, once I believe in him and have faith, works through amazing coincidences to show me that he is there and cares deeply. I know that I have a God who loves me just the way I am, but too much to let me stay that way. So he allows circumstances to happen in my life that will draw me closer to him and learn to be who he is molding me to be.


Psalms 14:1 NIV
The fool says in his heart, "There is no God." They are corrupt, their deeds are vile; there is no one who does good.

Matthew 9:29 NIV
Then he touched their eyes and said, "According to your faith will it be done to you";

Mark 4:40 NIV
He said to his disciples, "Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?"

Luke 17:1 NIV
Jesus said to his disciples: "Things that cause people to sin are bound to come, but woe to that person through whom they come.

Romans 3:1 So what difference does it make who's a Jew and who isn't, who has been trained in God's ways and who hasn't? 2 As it turns out, it makes a lot of difference - but not the difference so many have assumed. 3 So, what if, in the course of doing that, some of those Jews abandoned their post? God didn't abandon them. Do you think their faithlessness cancels out his faithfulness? 4 Not on your life! Depend on it: God keeps his word even when the whole world is lying through its teeth. Scripture says the same: Your words stand fast and true; Rejection doesn't faze you. 5 But if our wrongdoing only underlines and confirms God's rightdoing, shouldn't we be commended for helping out? Since our bad words don't even make a dent in his good words, isn't it wrong of God to back us to the wall and hold us to our word? These questions come up. 6 The answer to such questions is no, a most emphatic No! How else would things ever get straightened out if God didn't do the straightening? 7 It's simply perverse to say, "If my lies serve to show off God's truth all the more gloriously, why blame me? I'm doing God a favor." 8 Some people are actually trying to put such words in our mouths, claiming that we go around saying, "The more evil we do, the more good God does, so let's just do it!" That's pure slander, as I'm sure you'll agree. We're All in the Same Sinking Boat 9 So where does that put us? Do we Jews get a better break than the others? Not really. Basically, all of us, whether insiders or outsiders, start out in identical conditions, which is to say that we all start out as sinners. Scripture leaves no doubt about it: 10 There's nobody living right, not even one, 11 nobody who knows the score, nobody alert for God. 12 They've all taken the wrong turn; they've all wandered down blind alleys. No one's living right; I can't find a single one. 13 Their throats are gaping graves, their tongues slick as mud slides. Every word they speak is tinged with poison. 14 They open their mouths and pollute the air. 15 They race for the honor of sinner-of-the-year, 16 litter the land with heartbreak and ruin, 17 Don't know the first thing about living with others. 18 They never give God the time of day. 19 This makes it clear, doesn't it, that whatever is written in these Scriptures is not what God says about others but to us to whom these Scriptures were addressed in the first place! And it's clear enough, isn't it, that we're sinners, every one of us, in the same sinking boat with everybody else? 20 Our involvement with God's revelation doesn't put us right with God. What it does is force us to face our complicity in everyone else's sin. 21 But in our time something new has been added. What Moses and the prophets witnessed to all those years has happened. 22 The God-setting-things-right that we read about has become Jesus-setting-things-right for us. And not only for us, but for everyone who believes in him. For there is no difference between us and them in this. 23 Since we've compiled this long and sorry record as sinners (both us and them) and proved that we are utterly incapable of living the glorious lives God wills for us, 24 God did it for us. Out of sheer generosity he put us in right standing with himself. A pure gift. He got us out of the mess we're in and restored us to where he always wanted us to be. And he did it by means of Jesus Christ. 25 God sacrificed Jesus on the altar of the world to clear that world of sin. Having faith in him sets us in the clear. God decided on this course of action in full view of the public - to set the world in the clear with himself through the sacrifice of Jesus, finally taking care of the sins he had so patiently endured. 26 This is not only clear, but it's now - this is current history! God sets things right. He also makes it possible for us to live in his rightness. 27 So where does that leave our proud Jewish insider claims and counterclaims? Canceled? Yes, canceled. What we've learned is this: God does not respond to what we do; we respond to what God does. 28 We've finally figured it out. Our lives get in step with God and all others by letting him set the pace, not by proudly or anxiously trying to run the parade. 29 And where does that leave our proud Jewish claim of having a corner on God? Also canceled. God is the God of outsider non-Jews as well as insider Jews. 30 How could it be otherwise since there is only one God? God sets right all who welcome his action and enter into it, both those who follow our religious system and those who have never heard of our religion. 31 But by shifting our focus from what we do to what God does, don't we cancel out all our careful keeping of the rules and ways God commanded? Not at all. What happens, in fact, is that by putting that entire way of life in its proper place, we confirm it.

Matthew 24:5 For many will come in my name, claiming, 'I am the Christ, ' and will deceive many. 6 You will hear of wars and rumors of wars, but see to it that you are not alarmed. Such things must happen, but the end is still to come. 7 Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be famines and earthquakes in various places. 8 All these are the beginning of birth pains. 9 "Then you will be handed over to be persecuted and put to death, and you will be hated by all nations because of me. 10 At that time many will turn away from the faith and will betray and hate each other, 11 and many false prophets will appear and deceive many people. 12 Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold, 13 but he who stands firm to the end will be saved. 14 And this gospel of the kingdom will be preached in the whole world as a testimony to all nations, and then the end will come. 15 "So when you see standing in the holy place 'the abomination that causes desolation,' spoken of through the prophet Daniel--let the reader understand--

The Quest for the Historical Jesus by C. Fetty

For almost two thousand years, one man has been at the forefront of scholarly conversation. There have been thousands of books written about him, T-shirts advertizing him, and bumper stickers proclaiming their belief in or against him. Christians around the globe have continued to claim that he is the risen Son of God, while other groups argue that he was a well-planned hoax at the very best. Whether he was joked about, hated, and mocked, or applauded, esteemed and honored; Jesus Christ has made a profound impact on society.

So how do we know what is truth and what is myth? How do we know who the Jesus of history actually was? “…This marginal Jew in a marginal province at the eastern end of the Roman Empire left no writings of his own (as Cicero did), no archaeological monuments or artifacts (as Augustus did), nothing that comes directly from him without mediators (Meier 25). Many people know of him from the stories in the Bible but aren’t really aware of all of the controversy surrounding him. In fact, no one man has had so many personalities attributed to him throughout history. According to Edward James in an article from Christianity Today, Jesus has been made out to be a “a feminist, liberationist”, “a Hellenistic sage”, “the wicked priest Qumran who eloped with Mary Magdalene and who survived crucifixion by drinking snake poison”, “a shaman-like charismatic”, “a peasant Jewish cynic”, and a “Magician” (Edwards 16). With all of these so-called Jesus’ lurking out there, it is no wonder we find it difficult to wade through the nonsense and find who Jesus actually was.

In 1985, a group called the Jesus Seminar was founded and has been highly publicized since. They developed a color-coded voting method that was used to depict which of Jesus’ many sayings were authentic (Edwards 15). The problem with this group is that they came into their study with preconceived notions about what was possible and what was not. They started their study with certain pillars of thought that basically put aside Jesus saying anything about the end of the world, anything that couldn’t be proven, and anything their scholars thought he didn’t actually say (Johnson). So, this could pretty much rule out anything. The following is an example of the kind of changes that the Jesus Seminar made on the New Testament text from Mark 2:3-12. This is the original text:
6 Now some teachers of the law were sitting there, thinking to themselves, 7 "Why does this fellow talk like that? He's blaspheming! Who can forgive sins but God alone?" 8 Immediately Jesus knew in his spirit that this was what they were thinking in their hearts, and he said to them, "Why are you thinking these things? 9 Which is easier: to say to the paralytic, 'Your sins are forgiven,' or to say, 'Get up, take your mat and walk'? 10 But that you may know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins . . ." He said to the paralytic, 11 "I tell you, get up, take your mat and go home." 12 He got up, took his mat and walked out in full view of them all. This amazed everyone and they praised God, saying, "We have never seen anything like this (NIV)!"

According to the Jesus Seminar’s “The Five Gospels”, Jesus did not say any of the quoted text at all. Here is what their text looked like (the bolded black being things that were not actually said):
“6 Some of the scholars were sitting there and silently wondering: 7 "Why does that fellow say such things? He's blaspheming! Who can forgive sins accept the one true God?" 8 And right away, because Jesus sensed in his spirit that they were raising questions like this among themselves, he says to them: “Why do you entertain questions about such things? 9 Which is easier, to say to the paralytic, 'Your sins are forgiven,' or to say, 'Get up, pick up your mat and walk'? 10 But so you may realize that [on earth] the son of Adam has authority to forgive sins, he says to the paralytic, 11 "You there, get up, pick up your mat and go home!" 12 And he got up, picked his mat right up, and walked out as everyone looked on. So they all became ecstatic, extolled God, and exclaimed, “We’ve never seen the likes of this!"”
Without the bolded statements above, this passage can mean something entirely different than it was intended. The Jesus Seminar takes this out to make the passage mean that we ALL as “sons of Adam” are capable of healing people by our own power. In fact, they claim that Christ didn’t think of himself as equal to God at all (Funk 44). If this were the case, then Jesus was not committing blasphemy as was stated as the reason for his crucifixion and leaves us to question why he was crucified? This major hole in the Jesus Seminar’s argument leaves a lot to question as to their legitimacy.

One of the major reasons for Christ’s crucifixion was because of his claiming himself equal to God. Look at Matthew 26:63-68 in the New Testament:
“63 But Jesus remained silent. The high priest said to him, "I charge you under oath by the living God: Tell us if you are the Christ, the Son of God." 64 "Yes, it is as you say," Jesus replied. "But I say to all of you: In the future you will see the Son of Man sitting at the right hand of the Mighty One and coming on the clouds of heaven." 65 Then the high priest tore his clothes and said, "He has spoken blasphemy! Why do we need any more witnesses? Look, now you have heard the blasphemy. 66 What do you think?" "He is worthy of death," they answered. 67 Then they spit in his face and struck him with their fists. Others slapped him 68 and said, "Prophesy to us, Christ. Who hit you (NIV)?"”
The Jews did not like Jesus claiming to be a deity, among other things, and killed him because of it. This was all done according to several prophesies in the Old Testament. A good example of one of these is Isaiah 53:3 where it is written, “He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering. Like one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not (NIV).

Fortunately, there are several sources outside the Bible that also confirm that Jesus lived, rose in popularity, and then subsequently died under Pontius Pilate. The first-century Jewish historian Josephus and Roman writers Pliny the Younger, Tacitus, Suetonius, and Lucian all had writings that verified Jesus’ authenticity. These writings also showed that people had already begun worshiping him all the way to Rome within twelve years after his death (Gundry 92). “In addition, historian Gary Habermas, author of The Historical Jesus, has detailed thirty-nine sources outside the Bible that provide further corroboration for more than one hundred facts about Jesus’ life, teachings, death, and resurrection (Geisler 90).” One reliable example of this comes from the Babylonian Talmud where it is written, “33…on the eve of the Passover Yeshu 34 was hanged. For forty days before the execution took place, a herald went forth and cried, 'He is going forth to be stoned because he has practiced sorcery and enticed Israel to apostasy (Talmud 43a).” According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary online, the definition of apostasy is the “renunciation of a religious faith or abandonment of a previous loyalty.” This shows that the Jews saw Jesus as someone who had real power and used it to turn people away from their faith. If Jesus was not doing radical things that caused certain Jews to change their ways, why would they put this in their religious texts? They hated Jesus and would not want to esteem him by saying he was capable of such things if he was not.

In the Bible, Jesus came down the hardest on the Jewish leaders because of their hypocrisy. In Matthew 12, the Pharisees are trying to accuse Jesus of driving out demons because of his affiliation with the “prince of demons”. Jesus responds with "25…Every kingdom divided against itself will be ruined, and every city or household divided against itself will not stand. 26 If Satan drives out Satan, he is divided against himself. How then can his kingdom stand (NIV)?” He then goes on to denounce these Pharisees with:
“33 "Make a tree good and its fruit will be good, or make a tree bad and its fruit will be bad, for a tree is recognized by its fruit. 34 You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. 35 The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him. 36 But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken. 37 For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned (NIV)."
The Pharisees did not like that Jesus spent most of his time with “sinners” and tax collectors. They chastised him on several occasions for this. Jesus’ response was “…It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners (Mark 2:17 NIV)."

So, the Jewish authorities claim Jesus was an evil sorcerer, capable of turning their own away from their faith, but Jesus asks why would evil cast out evil? The Jesus Seminar claims Jesus did not intend for people to think of him as the Son of God and did not perform miracles, but then why was he killed? According to the New Testament, Jesus himself claimed he was capable of forgiving sins, healing people, and that he would be seated at the right hand of God coming on the clouds of heaven. Ultimately we each have to decide if the information available will make us side with the jokers, haters, and mockers; or if we want to take a step toward faith and believe that Jesus is to be applauded, esteemed and honored. Jesus said, “13 Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. 14 But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it (Matthew 8:13-14 NIV).” The choice is yours.


Work Cited
Babylonian Talmud: Tractate Sanhedrin, Folio 43a. Retrieved October 16, 2010, from http://www.come-and-hear.com/sanhedrin/sanhedrin_43.html
Edwards, James R. (1996). Who Do Scholars Say I Am? Christianity Today, 3/5/96, Vol. 40 Issue 3, p14
Funk, Robert W. (1993). The Five Gospels: What Did Jesus Really Say?, New York, New York: Harper Collins
Geisler, Normal, and Ravi Zacharias. Who Made God? And Answers to Over 100 Other Tough Questions of Faith. Grand Rapids, Michigan: Zondervan, 2003.
Gundry, Robert H. (2003). A Survey of the New Testament, Fourth Edition. Grand Rapids, Michigan: Zondervan.
Johnson, Luke Timothy. (1995). The Jesus Seminar's Misguided Quest for the Historical Jesus. By: Christian Century, 00095281, 1/3/96, Vol. 113, Issue 1
NIV (1984). New International Version Bible. Grand Rapids, Michigan: Zondervan Retrieved from http://www.biblestudytools.com
Meier, John P. & Joel Peter Johnson. (1991). The Marginal Jew: Rethinking the Historical Jesus: The Roots of the Problem and the Person, Vol. 1, New York, New York: Doubleday.

The battle is on...

I thought I would take the time to expose the a few of the Devil's lies to those of you who are interested. I'll make it as short and sweet as possible, but will try to give details enough so you know what I'm talking about. These are not in any particular order, just whatever comes to me first.

Lie #1 - Evolution of the species.

This is a great lie that Satan uses because if everything began on its own and just kept improving and "randomly" becoming more complex over time then it is obvious that there is no God needed to create the earth and everything in it.

Really??? Come on people. You DO NOT have to be a rocket scientist to get that this idea is just ridiculous! Lets look at a couple of really simple symbiotic relationships. So, biology says that everything came from nothing. Can it be explained how it is possible then that many plants cannot survive without the pollination that comes from bees, butterflies, and hummingbirds? On the same note, bees, butterflies, and hummingbirds wouldn't survive without the plants that they pollinate. Then what about our CO2 and oxygen exchange? Mammals breath out the CO2 needed for plant life to live and plants secrete the O2 that mammals need to live. Hmmm... Yet somehow many people still live with these little evolutionary blinders on and tell me that I'm silly for believing in an amazing God who created everything to work together perfectly. At least my explanation makes sense. For those of you who still aren't convinced, try throwing some stuff on the floor and see how long it takes for it to miraculously put itself away neatly on the shelf. Why yes, of course organization is the natural way of things when left to their own devices.

Lie #2 - People should be able to whatever they want with their own body.

Satan has used this one for a long time. It is a great tool for spreading diseases, bringing about unwanted children, breaking up families, hurting loved ones, killing babies, etc. All of which the devil thoroughly enjoys. Personal rights (AKA selfish desires) are the devil's playground.

You want to challenge me on this one? Well, why not do a search on the # of deaths to AIDS in the last decade. How about the rate of divorce and effect on the children involved? Number of babies murdered through abortion (AKA Eugenics)? All this in the name of personal freedom or should I say selfish freedom because all these freedoms lead to emotional captivity, life altering sadness, or destruction of others.

Lie #3 - Sex/living together before marriage is a good way to test out if you are a good match with the person.

This one sounds good. You know...why not try it out first just to be sure. You wouldn't want to have to go through a nasty divorce if it wasn't necessary.

Here is an interesting article to read about this:
http://www.adherents.com/misc/marriage.html

I guess God knew what he was talking about when he said in Song of Songs (which happens to be a very beautiful, sensual, book in the Bible about love) 8:4 "I want you to promise, O women of Jerusalem, not to awaken love until the time is right."

Why? Well, maybe, just maybe, we were meant to be cherished and valued enough to be worth waiting for. Why do you think there is a seal on women? This was meant to be a gift that was opened at the right time not a utility tool just waiting in your pocket to pull out for every occasion. Sorry for the analogy, but seriously. We want to be valued in our relationships, but we don't want to do what it takes to show ourselves as valuable. Do you give your prize possessions to everyone who asks? Apparently we don't think of ourselves as a prize...that my dears is exactly where the devil would have us be.

So, lets retrace things here. The devil would have you believe that you were so worthless that you came from sludge, transformed into frogs, then a gorilla, until finally you became the disease infested, heartless, baby killing, bad parent who is so NOT valuable in any way, shape or form...AND especially not worth being waited on or being loved beyond measure because frankly you are not really lovable as you are.

Now, lets look who we are to God:

Psalms 139:13 NLT
You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb.

Psalms 36:7 NLT
How precious is your unfailing love, O God! All humanity finds shelter in the shadow of your wings.

Psalms 86:15 NLT
But you, O Lord, are a merciful and gracious God, slow to get angry, full of unfailing love and truth.

Isaiah 30:18 NLT
But the LORD still waits for you to come to him so he can show you his love and compassion. For the LORD is a faithful God. Blessed are those who wait for him to help them.

Hosea 12:6 NLT
So now, come back to your God! Act on the principles of love and justice, and always live in confident dependence on your God.

Zephaniah 3:17 NLT
For the LORD your God has arrived to live among you. He is a mighty savior. He will rejoice over you with great gladness. With his love, he will calm all your fears. He will exult over you by singing a happy song."

Romans 5:5 NLT
And this expectation will not disappoint us. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.

Romans 5:8 NLT
But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.

Romans 8:38 NLT
And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from his love. Death can't, and life can't. The angels can't, and the demons can't. Our fears for today, our worries about tomorrow, and even the powers of hell can't keep God's love away.

1 Corinthians 2:9 NLT
That is what the Scriptures mean when they say, "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, and no mind has imagined what God has prepared for those who love him."

Ephesians 3:18-19 NLT
And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love really is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it. Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God.

Love...

Jesus taught throughout the gospels to love God with all your heart and to love your neighbor as yourself (Matthew 22:38-39, Mark 12:30-31, and Luke 10:27). Then in John 15:12, Jesus reiterates with, “My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you (NIV).” So, love…whether for God, your neighbor or yourself, is a key element that runs throughout all of the gospels. When we look at Paul’s writings, we can see the same theme.

Paul talks about the importance of loving God on several different occasions in his letters, but probably the most beautiful verse comes from 1 Corinthians 2:9 where he says, “…”No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him."

In Galatians 5:14, Paul says, “The entire law is summed up in a single command: "Love your neighbor as yourself." Whether you are holding a fellow Christian accountable, feeding the poor, caring for children, or anything else; you should do it in love. “The same love and help that we extend to those who are our friends and close relatives we should extend to all those who are in need. Conversely, those who are in need have a claim on our love. We need to consider them as our neighbors… (Ateek).”

Something that is often forgotten about loving our neighbor as we love ourselves is that we do in fact need to love ourselves. 1 Corinthians 6:19 says, “Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own.” I think this verse points out that loving our body and treating it with godly respect is important because it is not our own. It is a beautiful creation of God.

Ateek, Naim. " Who Is My Neighbor?." http://0-vnweb.hwwilsonweb.com.library.regent.edu/hww/results/results_single_fulltext.jhtml;hwwilsonid=UFXA1F1QPBXW1QA3DIMSFGOADUNGIIV0

I little tidbit I wrote for class about Grace vs. Law

In Galatians 4:6 Paul writes, “Because you are sons, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out, ""Abba", Father." I think in order to fully understand what the concept of “grace vs. law” is we must fully understand what it means to be a child of a loving father. A child of a loving father has a dad who is there for him through thick and thin. Who loves him no matter what, but wants what is best for that child above all else. A loving father will discipline that child to ensure the child understands the rules he has set up for the safety and protection of the child. Once this relationship has been established, the child will then yearn for the approval of the father; at first so he does not receive discipline and then so he experiences the father’s love to the fullest. So God, being our heavenly Father may say to us, like he said to the Isrealites, “Hear O Isreal” in Deuternomy 6:4 (NIV). “God's command that Israel “hear” is not so different from a parent asking a child, “Are you listening?,” by which the parent really means, “If you are listening you will do what I ask you.” To hear God is to obey God (Bader-Scott).” So we have grace because we are saved through Christ because of God’s love for us, BUT we follow the law because of our love, devotion, and respect for God our “Abba, Father”. While our attempts to follow the law may look to God like the indiscernible scribblings of a 4-year-old, he knows our heart and can look upon us through his Son and say “well done, my good and faithful servant!… (Luke 19:17 NIV).”

Bader-Saye, Scott. "Listening: Authority and Obedience." The Blackwell Companion to Christian Ethics. Hauerwas, Stanley and Samuel Wells (eds). Blackwell Publishing, 2006. Blackwell Reference Online. 23 September 2010

1st class discussion assignment

According to the American Heritage Dictionary online, one of the definitions for background is: “The circumstances and events surrounding or leading up to an event or occurrence (American Heritage).” I believe this is a good general definition of what “background” in the context of learning the history surrounding the New Testament means.

There are several reasons why someone should spend time studying the world in which the New Testament was written. One of the most important reasons is that God values wisdom and knowledge and says over and over again throughout scripture that we are to seek them out. So, we are being good stewards of our minds by studying and learning about the things God has been involved in. When I read the Bible, it is alive with historical facts, data, and culturally relevant information. It would be easy to just read the pages, get Christian doctrine, and learn about how we are supposed to live, but we would be missing a piece of the puzzle.

Learning about the history and why people chose to do the things they did back then strengthens our faith. In Chapter 4 of “A Survey of the New Testament” by Robert H. Gundry, it talks about the great lengths early Christians went to in order to maintain the message of Christ by setting up strict criteria as to which books were part of the New Testament and accurately copying them. It goes on to ensure us that our current Bibles have been compared to the ancient texts and do not have a large enough degree of error to change the meanings (Gundry 80-85). This ensures us that the message that Christ came to preach is the message that we are still getting today.

Finally, it helps us to know that Scripture is accurate and historically sound. This is important because some people consider the story of Christ a folktale passed on through generations. They have not studied the historicity of the scriptures in order to see their accuracy. However, if you take the time to look, you can see they have been verified over and over again throughout history.

So, by learning the background information about the New Testament we are pleasing God by seeking knowledge, strengthening our faith, and building confidence. This in essence will allow us to be more comfortable sharing our faith with others because we will have a stronger foundation on which to stand.

What if you died today?

I want you to imagine that you die today. You see the bright lights that everyone always talks about as you ascend up into the cloudy sky. There is a beautiful staircase and angels are singing the most beautiful song you have ever heard. Your mind is racing wondering if you are dreaming or if you are actually dead. You have never heard such amazing harmonies in your life and the light is so bright that everything around you shines like a thousand diamonds glistening in the sun. You keep gliding along and the angels seem to be beckoning you to come up the stairs and into these magnificent pearly gates. They look like someone carved them out of a giant pearl that was all one piece and they shimmer and sparkle in a way that would almost blind you if you were using your human eyes. You keep going and as you continue on, you see a giant throne coming up in the distance. You know instantly that it is God. A plaguing guilt rises up in you that you have never known on earth. Yes, you have felt something like it before, but never to this magnitude...never this much. You feel ashamed to look into His face as you approach Him. When you get near enough that you can almost touch his feet, you fall on your face and cry out in pain at the guilt that you feel in your heart from all the baggage that you carried your whole life...all the unforgiven sins that you were never quite able to get past. God looks at you and you feel His overwhelming presence and you know He knows you. He knows you like you have never been known. He knows everything that you hid from people in your lifetime, everything that you thought in the depths of your heart, all your lies, deceptions, hateful thoughts, hurtful words...He knows it all. He says in a voice that your not sure is in your head or out loud, "My child, why should I let you into heaven?" You stumble over your words and you can't think of one good reason, but you say, "I was a good person, God. I wasn't great. I didn't always do the right thing, but in the grand scheme of things I was a lot better that a lot of other people." You see tears forming in His eyes and He says, "Depart from me, you do not know me." You knew going in that He had tried to get your attention so many times in your life and you never listened to Him. As you stumbled backwards with tears streaming down your face, you see someone else coming up behind you. God looks at him with this amazing look of love and says, "My child, why should I let you into heaven?" The man looks up at God and through sobs says, "Lord, you shouldn't let me into heaven. I'm a sinner and I have always been a sinner, but in your everlasting love, you sent your son to die for my sins and I believed whole heartedly that he did. So, I did nothing to deserve to be allowed to enter...you paid the price in full for me." God then smiled at the man and said, "welcome home, my son."

You see, God wants us to know that we are not perfect and unable to be that way. He wants us to come to Him just as we are...baggage, sin, past hurts, etc. It isn't about church or living a perfect life. It's all about the Son. As humans, we carry around everything that we do and have done on our backs. It's part of us. It weighs us down and gets heavier as we get older. God sent Jesus to die for us so he could take that weight from us because it isn't ours to carry. He says, "give it to me, let me come into your heart and life and carry your hardships, troubles, and pain. Let me bear your burden so you can walk in freedom."

I tell you this as someone who knows what God can do and as someone who knows Him and adores Him. I didn't always feel that way though. I used to not want anything to do with Christians. I thought they were hypocritical and judgmental. I had only ever had bad experiences with people who claimed to be Christian. Then I met my husband and he asked if I would go to church with him just one time. He said that if I didn't like it, he would never ask me to go again. So I agreed thinking, "what have I gotten myself into?" BUT I went and I was amazed at the people I met. They were warm and friendly. They were genuine. I listened to the service and I felt like I was home for the first time in my life. It ended up that I wanted to go to church and hear what they were talking about. One week the pastor asked if anyone wanted to accept Jesus into their heart and I raised my hand. Since then, I have come to know God in ways that I didn't know possible. I have an amazing relationship with Him. I have found that He has the best sense of humor! I can't imagine adoring anyone more. I love my husband dearly, but he is definitely second to God. He has done amazing things for me even through suffering and pain and He has shown me so much that I never would have been able to understand without His wisdom. So, I can tell you that God is real because I know Him. I have a relationship with Him. He wants to have that relationship with you too and it is the easiest thing in the world to get.

Millions of people will go to hell for the 12 inches between their head and their heart because they can't wrap their head around the whys of God. Well, there are some things that you can't know this side of heaven, but you can know that you are saved and going there. All you have to do is ask. The bible says, "ask and you shall receive." If you would like to accept Jesus into your heart today, just pray this simple prayer:

"Dear God, I know that I am a sinner. I know that you sent Jesus to earth to die for my sins. I ask that you come into my heart and be the Lord of my life. Thank you so much for saving me! In Jesus name, Amen."

Welcome Home!

What is love?

Sometimes as humans we get confused about what it means to love. We say things like, "My girlfriend is so hot, I love her!" OR "I don't know what happened, I just fell out of love with my spouse." The real truth is that a lot of people don't know how to really love. They think that love is that gushy feeling you get when you look at someone and just have to have them. Or that love is when you just have to be around someone because you have so much fun with them. Real love may have these aspects sometimes, but it endures without them. There are some really beautiful verses in the bible that talk about what it means to really love. It starts off with some of my favorite verses...

1 Corinthians 13:1 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails.

Before I came to know God, love always felt empty to me. It was always contingent on something. I always thought...I love this person because of this or that NOT that I love this person because God created them. Now, obviously, the love you have for a spouse exceeds this neighborly love because you don't make an "until death do you part" vow with everyone. So, I think it's also good to see what the bible says about the love that husbands and wives should have for each other.

Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church-- 30 for we are members of his body.
31. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." 32 This is a profound mystery--but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

I know that some women could read this who are not followers of Christ and think it is ridiculous that women should submit to their husbands, but if you take the whole thing together it is easier to understand what is being said. If you have a husband that loves you "as Christ loved the church" that means that you have a husband that is willing to die for you. That means that you have a husband that knows you inside and out and does not want something for you that does not honor you. That means that you have a husband that is willing to put you ahead of himself. If all this is true, it is not difficult to submit to him because he has your best interests in mind. From what I know of men (which I still have a lot to learn) being respected and valued goes a long way. When a man has a wife who lifts him up and tells him how proud she is to have him as her husband and values his opinions, it is way easier for him to honor her and lift her up.

So, is this an easy kind of love? No, not really. I personally think that it is almost impossible without Christ to guide us. I know that I personally have a natural tendency to be selfish, manipulative, and distant when I get angry or upset. I don't want to hear the truth about myself when I am doing the wrong thing. I want to be able to keep thinking that I am right at all costs even if it means that someone else has to be the scapegoat for my flaws. Robert can be cold and hard-headed when he feels backed into a corner. He sometimes decides not to listen or value the opinions of others when he feels like he isn't being respected. We both come into our marriage with baggage from the past. We both have areas where we continue to struggle, where we need to grow, where we need to lift each other up. That is the beauty of a Christ-centered marriage though. When we listen to Him, He guides us to do the right thing. He whispers to us to stop and listen when we don't want to hear. He opens our eyes to the other's hurt when all we want to see is what we think of as injustices to ourselves. He shows us our shortcomings so that we can come to His thrown on our knees and ask Him to forgive us because we really don't know what we are doing. He then gives us the strength to go back and love the way He has asked us to...which is giving ourselves completely over to each other and to Christ who strengthens us.

The thing is, this is always a choice that has to be made. It isn't what comes naturally. We naturally want to be selfish. We naturally want our own way. We naturally want to think that we are always right. We have to choose to listen. We have to choose to honor and respect. We have to choose to love even when it's hard, even when we feel like turning and running the other way. Only then can we finally feel the fullness of what REAL love is and it is anything but empty. I can honestly say that since I have become a follower of Christ, love is amazing!

Christs love for Robert and I is something that I never could have imagined. It is a love that has taken away my fear of death because if Christ died for me and I am assured eternal life with Him then anything that I have to endure in this life is only temporary. Everything is a lot less scary when you know it is only temporary. This is why you may have heard people say that once they became a Christian they felt free for the first time in their lives. Also, there have been so many times that we have been blessed by doing what God asked us to do. So, when you hear people say they are slaves to Christ, it really isn't a bad thing. Doing what he asks almost always brings some sort of blessing...even if it is painful, hard, or ends in death.

Robert and I have also been able to love each other more fully. When there is honesty, trust, and forgiveness coupled with Christs love in a marriage it makes that marriage so much stronger. It makes it easier to go through hard times and struggles. It makes it easier to see that person as Christ sees them. I know that when I look at Robert with that kind of love I am incredibly blessed. I have a husband who values me and makes me feel beautiful even when I am at my worst. I have a husband who is willing to do anything for me even when I'm selfish. I have a husband who puts me ahead of himself even when he would rather be doing something else. At my best, he has a wife who looks at him as her champion even when he feels small. Who thinks there is nothing he can't do even when he thinks he can't do anymore. Who thinks he is the greatest gift of her life even when he is unsure of himself. Together, we have a God who loves us more than either of us could have ever even tried to dream up.

Romans 8:38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

39 weeks and counting...

I thought I was big at 8 months, but that was nothing!

Baby Room Stuff...

I have been working on Elijah's room. A friend of mine helped me make his quilt and we are still working on the crib skirt. For the mural, I still have a long way to go. I have lots of animals and foliage to add. Robert and I just went and picked out the rug last week, which I think is super cute. It's all coming together. I still have to put the fabric on the wall with the trim under the mural, but wanted to finish painting first so it didn't accidentally get on the fabric. So, here it is so far.

Dear Sun...

Dear Sun,
Today I came to the conclusion that you do not exist. I have not seen you in many days and do not see how you can even be real at this point. It has been raining and stormy for so long and I haven't seen any sign of you. This storm is crazy! How do you expect me to believe in you when you allow things like this to happen? I see no light. I feel no warmth. The roads are flooded, there is mud everywhere, it's cold, dreary, and honestly that proves that you aren't real. It can't be both ways! There can't be a Sun that is full of warmth and light when all this other crap is all I see. If you were real you'd dry up this place! You'd give us some light! There wouldn't even be such things as clouds or storms! So, you might as well just forget about me ever believing in you!
Sincerely,
Me

Dear Me,
I am still here.
Sincerely,
The Sun

OK, I'm Listening

We had a really great service at Boys Town on Sunday. One of the other female family teachers was speaking and one of her points really struck me. She was talking about possession and how when we accept Jesus into our hearts he possesses us. She used a really funny example of Ghostrider and how Nicolas Cage is possessed by the Ghostrider every night to go and do things. She was saying how being possessed by Jesus is like that...only different. :) So here this woman is on stage being totally open and real...holding nothing back for God. As she spoke, she would just start singing to emphasis something or let out a scream to explain a point. It was an amazing representation of the Freedom that comes with being a Christian. She didn't seem to care if all the kids thought she was crazy, she just loves Jesus and wants them to understand how utterly amazing his love is and how much he did for us to save us.

So, yesterday started out kind of funny anyway. I went to bed on Saturday night with God having told me that I was to get up and go to church with the boys for Robert so he could have a little bit of time in the morning. At the time, it sounded like a nice idea of something to do for him for Valentines Day, but when He (God...not Robert) woke me up at 8 o'clock to get up and get ready I was not as enthused. I got up to use the restroom and had completely talked myself out of it as I had achy hips and back and was still really tired from not sleeping all that great. So I crawled back into bed and laid down. The bed was really comfortable then and I felt like I could sleep for another couple of hours. Then..."you know...you are not listening to me. I told you to get up and go to church this morning for your husband and that is where you need to be." But I'm so tired...I don't want to go. "Get up...I'll help you wake up."
So, after 10 minutes of this back and forth, I get up and roll out of bed begrudgingly. Then hobble over to the bathroom to take a shower. Since they just put in a new hot water heater last week, we of course have very little hot water (it's a BT thing). So I turn the knob all the way over to the hottest setting trying to stay warm...to no avail. At the time I was NOT saying, "thank you Jesus for sending cold water to wake me up." BUT I'm sure he was giggling up there all the same. I did, however, feel quite awake when I turned off the water shivering and scrambled to try to dry off quickly. :) Needless to say, Robert was pretty happy to have me fill in for him so he could have a little bit of time and thought the story of how I got up was pretty funny.
People often times ask how I know that God is real OR how I can believe in a loving God that allows people to suffer so much pain on Earth. Aside from the fact that I know Him and talk to Him pretty regularly and can personally attest to His absolute existence, I also see how much we grow as people through pain. Also, God is outside of time, so he knows the end of the story already. There is so much that is going to happen that we have no clue about, be He does. You can go through the Bible and see time and time again where he tells us what is going to happen and then later it happens. There are even things that are written in the Bible about what was going to happen later that has happened, but the actual event was never written in the Bible because it happened after the Bible was finished. So, He knows what is to come. He knows who is going to be spending all eternity with him. We don't. All we can know is about this tiny amount of time that we get to spend here during our lifetime, which in the grand scheme of things isn't very long. Yet, we kick our feet and cry to the God of this Universe that He is unfair and unjust...just like our little children do when they are angry that we took their toy away after they hit someone with it..."that's mine...you can't take it...it's not fair." And God looks down at us and says, "Really...is it yours?" I think that Job 38-40 in the Bible explains this so well.
http://biblestudy.crosswalk.com/mybst/default.aspx?type=bible&translation=NIV&bookcode=ps&bookname=Psalms&chapterid=119&verseid=45

Another thing that the sermon yesterday pointed out was that God loves us so much that he was willing to become human and suffer too. So we can't say that we have this illusive God who doesn't understand our suffering or doesn't hear our cries because he came down here as Jesus and experienced everything that we experience. He suffered the most excruciating death possible here on Earth and at the end said of his executioners, "Forgive them Father, for they know not what they do."

This is a great song...

Sunrise by Nicole Nordeman

If I had the chance
To go back again
Take a different road, bear a lighter load
Tell an easy story

I would walk away
With my yesterdays
And I would not trade what is broken for beauty only

Every valley
Every bitter chill
Made me ready to climb back up the hill
And find that . . .

You are sunrise
You are blue skies
How would I know the morning
If I knew not midnight?

You're my horizon
You're the light of a new dawn
So thank You, thank You
That after the long night, You are sunrise

There's a moment when
Faith caves in
There's a time when every soul is certain God is gone

But every shadow is evidence of sun
And every tomorrow holds out hope for us
For every one of us

You are sunrise
You are blue skies
How would I know the morning
If I knew not midnight?

You're my horizon
You're the light of a new dawn
So thank You, thank You
That after the long night, You are sunrise

You alone will shine
You alone can resurrect this heart of mine

You are sunrise
You are blue skies
How would I know the morning
If I knew not midnight?

You're my horizon
You're the light of a new dawn
So thank You, thank You
That after the long night, You are sunrise

You are sunrise

Pondering...

These two verses really remind me of where we are at regarding science and evolution. With all the evidence that is out there to show that these teachings are absolutely false, our scientific community holds firmly to them, refusing to teach our children anything else because it would go against their "safe" teachings and might get too many people thinking that the bible just might be true. It just goes to show that the deceiver has a tight hold on our world.

2 Timothy 4:3 NIV
For the time will come when men will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear.

2 Timothy 4:4 NIV
They will turn their ears away from the truth and turn aside to myths.

There are some interesting points made here.
http://www.spokanebiblechurch.com/Acrobat%20Files/Evidence.pdf

On another note, I have heard many Christians talk about the end times and say that God could come at any time. While it is true that he may come at any time, he has given us clear signs as to when his arrival might be. This is just one of the many passages talking about the end times. There is a part in here that talks about the end still being to come when you hear of wars and rumors of war. Then there is another part that talks about the birth pains. I think it would be easy to say that we are in the beginning of the birth pains, but we really don't know how long those will last. We, as Christians, still have to get to the point where we are hated by all men. I think it is safe to say that (while we don't know when it will be) the end is still to come.

Mark 13
1.As he was leaving the temple, one of his disciples said to him, "Look, Teacher! What massive stones! What magnificent buildings!"
2."Do you see all these great buildings?" replied Jesus. "Not one stone here will be left on another; every one will be thrown down."
3.As Jesus was sitting on the Mount of Olives opposite the temple, Peter, James, John and Andrew asked him privately,
4."Tell us, when will these things happen? And what will be the sign that they are all about to be fulfilled?"
5.Jesus said to them: "Watch out that no one deceives you.
6.Many will come in my name, claiming, 'I am he,' and will deceive many.
7.When you hear of wars and rumors of wars, do not be alarmed. Such things must happen, but the end is still to come.
8.Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be earthquakes in various places, and famines. These are the beginning of birth pains.
9."You must be on your guard. You will be handed over to the local councils and flogged in the synagogues. On account of me you will stand before governors and kings as witnesses to them.
10.And the gospel must first be preached to all nations.
11.Whenever you are arrested and brought to trial, do not worry beforehand about what to say. Just say whatever is given you at the time, for it is not you speaking, but the Holy Spirit.
12."Brother will betray brother to death, and a father his child. Children will rebel against their parents and have them put to death.
13.All men will hate you because of me, but he who stands firm to the end will be saved.
14."When you see 'the abomination that causes desolation' standing where it does not belong--let the reader understand--then let those who are in Judea flee to the mountains.

Mothers

Recently, I have been considering what it means to be a mother. There is really a lot involved. You spend years doing what you think is the best that you can do to later be told by your children all the things that you failed to do. I know that not all mothers experience this, but there is an aweful lot of them that do. I think that of those who think about it, we as women go into this experience with high hopes for our children. We have grand ideas about what our children will become or how they will succeed where we have failed. I don't think that the majority of us go in intending to make mistakes.

It is easy for me to look back at my own mother and see the things that she imparted on me that I value and want to pass on to my own children, but it is also easy to see her shortcomings and the things that I felt at one point or another were damaging. I suppose I could choose to be angry with her for all the things she failed to do or not do. I could blame her for all of my own shortcomings, hoping that somehow that would fix the situation, but that would only make me bitter.

Growing up, we always had food on the table, clothes on our backs, and a roof over our head. Even in the early years, when things were really hard financially, we were always taken care of. My mom always talked to me. She always told me why she didn't want me to do certain things. This helped me to develop good reasoning skills in certain situations. She also shared things with me about her life and why she had made the decisions that she did. She told me about her tragedies and hopes and the things that she wished she had done differently. This helped me to be a good communicator and maybe what some would call too transparent. At times, I would have said that I knew too much about my mom...that maybe in some areas I wished she had not shared certain things. This would be one of the areas that in the past I would have said I wished she had done differently. Now though, I see that because she shared that information with me I have learned about discretion and what it means to hold certain things closer to your heart. That there are things that my children don't need to know. For example, my private relationship with my husband is private and doesn't need to be discussed with my children. This doesn't mean I can't talk to them about the value of that relationship, why it is important, and how when they get older and get married it should be important to them. They can know that we both make mistakes and need to apologize for them to each other, but they don't need to know every mistake that we make. There should be a line between child and adult. Obviously, that changes a little as children grow into adults themselves, but not to the point where they know everything. So, instead of being upset with my mom for sharing intimate details of her life with me, I have just used it as a learning opportunity on what I do and don't want to share with my own children or anyone else for that matter. It is possible to have open communication with people without disclosing certain private details. If someone asks me about private things, I can say, "I am not going to share private details about my own life, but I will say that I think blah blah blah is an important part of blah blah blah for this reason...(replace blah blah blah with whatever we are discussing)."

I could have also been upset with my mom for having to take care of her when she had too much to drink and involving me in her arguments, but through that I have learned a lot too. First, I learned how to care for someone in need, how to put others ahead of myself at times, and how to help mediate an argument when needed. I also learned how to stay calm in situations where others may scream and yell. Finally, I learned that it is really hard to be young and have to take care of your parent. So it is important to try to make sure that my kids know how to handle crisis situtions that may arise so they can take care of us if needed in an emergency, but also that I don't want to put my kids into those types of situations needlessly.

As well as the things I mentioned earlier, some of the other good things that my mom worked hard to teach me are of great value to me also. She made sure that I respected authority figures, could empathize with others, knew the value of hard work, and that she loved me unconditionally, etc... These things I want to pass on to my children because I think they are important and valuable as well.

I guess the things that I need to take into motherhood are that I am going to make mistakes. There are going to be challenges and rough times and I am not going to know what to do. I might do the wrong thing, but hopefully my kids will be able to learn from that too. In all these things, I pray that God will help Robert and I to make good decisions and to seek Him first in everything that we teach to our kids. I pray that He helps us to stay close to Him throughout our lives so our children can see the value of a strong relationship with God. Above all, I pray that our children grow up to love God with all of their hearts, love others and love themselves. As a mother, if I manage that, I will have succeeded (with God's help of course) at my job. After that, I pray that wherever I fall short as a mom that God will fill in the gap and teach them what they need to know that I was unable to. (Um...God, I think you already know this, but that was for you...Thanks and Amen!)